Supporting my mum

FormerMember
FormerMember
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Hi, my mum was diagnosed at the end of last year with colon cancer which has now rapidly spread to her liver and lungs. 
whilst devastated with this diagnosis the hardest thing we are struggling with is that mum appears to have given up. She is not complying with medical advice, struggles to maintain her medication regime and is not eating and drinking. Mum has fallen into a state of depression and is not self caring - having to constantly be reminded to brush her hair, have a shower etc etc. We spend every waking minute worrying that mum has taken her meds, had a drink or food and mum doesn’t seem interested in trying  to get her strength up to start treatment. Today we have found out that she can’t have her treatment for the second time because she hasn’t done as she has been advised. We are so upset and swing between feeling desperately sorry and so angry at her which them makes us feel guilty! 
is there anyone struggling with the same issues that could give advice and help? Thankyou xx

  • Hi and welcome to the online community although I'm sorry you've had to find us

    It sounds like both you and your mum are in a very difficult place at the moment. Have you, or anyone else in the family, spoken to your mum's GP about how she is? Although they won't be able to discuss her with you, unless she's given her permission, you can make the GP aware of your concerns.

    As the online community is divided up into different support groups, I hope you don't mind me suggesting that you also join and post in the carers only group, if you are your mum's carer, or the family and friends group if you're not. They are both safe and supportive places to discuss your worries with others who have loved ones living with cancer.

    To join either of these groups just click on the links I've created and then choose 'click to join' or 'join' (depending on the device you're using) on the page that opens. You can then introduce yourself and post in the same way as you did here and join in with existing conversations by clicking on 'reply'. 

    It would be great if you could pop something about your mum's journey so far into your profile as it really helps others when answering or looking for someone with a similar diagnosis. It also means that you don't have to keep repeating yourself. To do this click on your username and then select 'Profile'. You can amend it at any time and if you're not sure what to write you can take a look at mine by clicking on my username.

    Sening a virtual ((hug))

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     "Never regret a day in your life, good days give you happiness, bad days give you experience"