Depression

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Hi I really hope someone can help. My dad was diagnosed with Neuroendocrine Tumours around 3 years ago now he had hormone injections at the beginning that seemed to work for a wile then stopped so he then went on to have radiotherapy which was quite intense and effected him a lot mentally and physically he lost a lot of weight and for 1 whole year was pretty much bed bound but after finishing the treatment we was told the radiotherapy had stopped the tumours growing for a whole year and he has now gone back onto the hormone injections which he will continue to have for the rest of he’s life they also said that he can now get back to living a relatively normal life if he builds himself back up as he lost all muscle in he's legs ect. Since hearing this amazing news the whole family have tried to bring he's spirits up and help him get back to being his happy bubbly self but he is in such a deep depression we have had no luck and don’t know what else to do. We have talked to him we took him to counselling wich he refused to go back to after 2 sessions. We tried antidepressants medication which didn’t mix well with he’s other medication so he had to stop that. He has a huge family that love him 9 grandchildren lots of friends and we’re all here to help him but he just doesn’t want to help himself. He sleeps most of the time and when he is awake he doesn’t want to even shower and get dressed if anyone talks to him he barely says 2 words back he will just stare at the wall in silence and only see the negative in everything. The whole family are literally at a point were we don’t know what else we can do. We would really appreciate some advice on what to do next as this is effecting the whole family especially my mum who cares for him. Thank you in advance x

  • Hello BCM9 and thank you for contacting the online community.

     

    I’m so sorry to hear about what your dad’s gone through and currently going through. I appreciate it must be hard to see him struggling like this. Is his hospital team, (Consultant/Clinical Nurse Specialist) aware of how he is just now? It might be worth bringing it to their attention so they can make sure he’s getting the support he needs.

     I know this is a road your dad may have gone down before but I would certainly encourage him to talk to his GP. They may:

     

    • give him a diagnosis, such as depression or anxiety
    • talk to him about online support, such as websites and apps
    • direct him to local support groups
    • refer him to another service, such as a clinical psychologist or psychiatrist
    • give your dad details of a talking therapy service he can contact himself
    • talk to him about changes to medication

     It’s ultimately up to your dad as to whether he accepts support or not of course BCM9, and I suppose that’s the frustrating thing. From what you’ve said, he doesn’t want to, or is unable to help himself which might be the first hurdle to overcome.

     Our publication How are you feeling? The emotional effects of cancer offers advice and guidance on the emotional effects of cancer. The booklet discusses how your dad may be feeling, coping with feelings, and dealing with relationship changes. It also talks about the symptoms of depression and how to get support.

     How are you just now BCM9? Do you have support, people you can talk to about how this is affecting you? We’re here for you, your dad, your mum and anyone else who’s affected by what’s happening with him just now. Please stay in touch if it helps to talk or if you have any further questions.

     Take care.

    Alex, Information and Support Adviser

    Remember you can also speak with the Macmillan Support Line team of experts. Phone free on 0808 808 0000 (7 days a week, 8am-8pm) or by email.