My father in law was diagnosed with cancer of the Oesophagus late last year. He couldn't eat at all and was tube fed through the nose. He's had his chemo, a huge operation and has been given the all clear and had his 'mop up chemo sessions, The problem is that he doesn't do anything at all.
He used to be on amphetamines 24/7 until a stroke (TIA) nearly 2 years ago scared him and he stopped drinking, smoking and the speed. He took a while to recover and we moved 400miles away a few months later. Not long after he moved in with us, he got his diagnoses maybe a month later and I did everything for him, he just laid on my sofa all day and night, despite having a room for him. Eventually he got a bungalow and now has had all his treatment and is in the clear.
But
He doesn't move, he lays on his sofa with the curtains shut, all day and all night, he has no cooker and usually just eats handfuls of cheese and ham etc. from the fridge. I've made many efforts to sort him a cooker but he doesn't want to cook, he has a bald spot on the back of his head from laying down constantly. I'm pretty sure the problem is that he thinks he is still very unwell but actually he is just 67 and not on amphetamine and drink etc.
I am having trouble helping my parter with this because despite me looking after him, I find him a rude and generally nasty man. My partner is devasted that his once energetic, full of chat dad that was in and out at all hours now never leaves the house or the sofa without an absolute need to go.
How are we supposed to get him to see that this is him now and he just needs to get himself up and going again or he'll never feel better. I'm not trying to get him to run a marathon, but opening his curtains everyday and maybe a walk to the local shop for the paper would be a huge difference
Any advice would be amazing. Thank you
