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what to do

Bonjour
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my partner has been diagnosed with terminal cancer and nothing more they can do . My partner has thrown me out not the first time due to spending a bit of time at christmas with family . He said how dare i when he is dieing. I just needed someone to talk to as well as i feel i am going through all of this on my own . I fear going back to see how he is as i will just get a triade of abuse . I feel so guilty not being there but i know the aggression and viciousness will pervail and mental state is already in tatters . Any suggestions i am at my wits end  

  • Hello  

     

    Thank you for getting in touch with us. I’m sorry to hear about what has been happening. It sounds like its been a really tough time for you over the last couple of weeks particularly over Christmas. It’s often the case that those closest to someone going through a diagnosis are often the ones that bear the brunt of their emotions. I’m sure you’ve done nothing wrong, and that your support is there for him whenever he needs it, so please try not to feel guilty. It might just be that he needs some time to process what is going on for him. It may be that in the coming days, he reaches out to you. In the meantime, it’s important to realise that we are here for you Bonjour.

    You’d be welcome to contact our freephone support line 0808 808 00 00 or our online webchat service. Both are open 8am – 8pm seven days a week. We will look to talk things through and provide a space for you to express how you are feeling about it.

    We have a booklet called, ‘talking with someone who has cancer’ It’s useful in providing guidance about to approach conversations with him, and how to support him.

    Maybe our friends and family forum on the community can also help guide you, as there may be others on there who have experienced something similar when supporting someone with cancer.

    Please do stay in touch with us here Bonjour.

    David, Information and Support Adviser

    Remember you can also speak with the Macmillan Support Line team of experts. Phone free on 0808 808 0000 (7 days a week, 8am-8pm) or by email.

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