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Moving back in with parent

FormerMember
FormerMember
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Hi!

The current situation I'm in is my Mom has been diagnosed with non-small cell cancer in her lungs. She got diagnosed last Monday and starts chemotherapy treatment today. She lives about 4 hours from me and I live with 3 roommates. Our lease is up in June 2022. I am debating moving back in to be with her to spend as much time as I can with her, while also worried about leaving my roommates. One of which is my childhood best friend. I am 21, racked up 4 grand in financial debt on credit cards due to coming back to Texas after my divorce and coming here with no employment. They are asking me to give them an answer by 2 weeks to determine if I'm going to for sure move out and I feel as if I need more time. Moving in with my mom would support her mentally and physically, while helping me financially. I feel like these are the times I should be with her the most while I know she would definitely do it for me. I am going to start a work from home position at bank of America soon allowing this opportunity to be possible.

I guess what I am asking for is advice on what to do moving forward. What would you do if you were in my shoes? 

  • Dear

     

    Thank you for your post. I’m so sorry to hear about your mom’s diagnosis and that you are going through a difficult time just now. It can be incredibly tough when a loved one receives a cancer diagnosis and important you both get the support you need just now.

     

    Keiko you mentioned your mom was diagnosed last Monday, this is so very recent and will take time to process, please be kind to yourself. You mentioned you live with 3 roommates, including your childhood best friend, it may be worth reaching out to them to talk about how you are feeling. Reaching out to friends and family when you’re going through a tough time can help to process your thoughts and feelings, they may also be able to offer information and support.

     

    Keiko, it sounds as though you have a lot on your plate just now. It’s important to take the time you need to make the decisions that feel right for you. From your message I can see you are living in the United States, is that correct? The reason I ask is it’s so important you get the information and support you need just now. Can I ask if you have reached out to any organisations in your country/area? There is a website where you can search for support in your country for anyone affected by cancer, you can find this here they will have helplines, family and friends support, live chat and more. It may be worth reaching out to see how they can assist both you and your mom just now.

     

    Keiko you mentioned moving in with your mom would help you both in different ways, this is a personal decision for you both to make when you feel ready. Does your mom have a health care team or specialist she can contact? They may be able to provide information and support at home or externally for you both.

     

    I can see you are a member of our online community which is great. Did you know we have a variety of forums you can access including Friends and Family Forum and Living with Cancer Outside the UK Forum. I wonder if accessing this may help you. People often report they find it useful conversing with others to help process what’s going on.

     

    I hope the information has helped today and you are able to access the support you need. Please know you are not alone in this.

     

    Take the best of care.

    Becki, Information and Support Adviser

    Remember you can also speak with the Macmillan Support Line team of experts. Phone free on 0808 808 0000 (7 days a week, 8am-8pm) or by email.

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