SOME NIGHTS I AM JUST ANGRY!!

Hi Peter,

Since being on this site and reading peoples experiences, seeing your blogs have certainly served as a  warning to me and i hope to many others.

I am sorry you are feeling so low and that the healing is not happening as fast as you hoped but you sound a very strong person.......i'm sure it will happen.

Sending extra chocolate your way. I find chocolate an amazing pain killer lol.

Take Care of yourself and take it easy at work.xxxx

Morning Peter, what a crap time you've had/are still having.  I have to say I don't think you should leave your leg - it looks infected again!  My cancer is completely different to you but I too have found life hard to deal with as my healing was a very long drawn out affair of infection after infection.  I have come to the point where the only person who can help is now me - I finally got on the scales and, to my horror, I've become overweight.  I live on pain relief, sleeping tablets, and have given up wearing the compression sleeve on my left arm as it makes my shoulder hurt.  I can do something though - lose a bit of weight.  Easier said than done - therefore, today I am going to be good.  Eat healthily, walk more, rest when required and honour myself for got this far.  Just as you have come so far, sometimes the last leg is the hardest hurdle - getting back our lives.  Please see your gp Peter, hope you enjoyed the chocolate and don't feel guilty - one day at a time is all you/I can do right now and that's enough.  God bless, you're not alone, we are here for you Annie x

Hey hon

Sorry you are suffering so. I do hope it goes soon. Not sure what to suggest as I have not suffered with wounds apart from my burns where no one else did.  Continue the fight and chocolate isn't good for melanoma.. dark chocolate is.. try eating foods that are good for skin healing like carrots and brocolli not the same as chocolate but it might speed it up a wee bit.

Hugs to make you feel better

Alethea xxx

Hey Peter, I have to agree there doesnt seem to be much improvement and I am really sorry you are feeling rubbish at the moment.  Having cancer isnt easy but sometimes the physical reminders we see everyday are so hard to cope with, dont beat yourself up about feeling angry or having chocolate if thats what you enjoy. Sorry if this sounds like a very obvious thing to say but have you thought about going to your GP or specialist and telling them how you feel?? Maybe there is something else they could try? I would have thought you would be further along in healing by now (from someone who doesnt know much about it). Hope you feel better soon I really do,

Love Chrissi xx

well tonight i kept all dressings off and got some air to it... after a while it had a tight feeling around the wound so i applied moisturiser... then the lymphopain kicked in so 2 more co-codomol and then i gave up and re dressed it with the light night dressings i put on just enough to keep it covered and germ free as there is still fluid coming out!!

i wont give up... i cant give up... but its getting to be boring now...!!!!!

thanks for the messages and advise i will try everything so please keep them coming...

p x