My dad received the dreaded phonecall from his ENT registrar on Friday afternoon that the biopsy's taken from his neck lump had shown some cancer cells. This was following an out patient appointment on Wednesday where the same doctor told us that they weren't concerned it was cancer and they had arranged an operation to remove the neck lump for further testing.
I feel like a rabbit stuck in the headlights. Trying to be strong for my dad, aswell as my mam who has recently lost both parents. She doesn't deserve this, but then again no-one does do they?
It all started just after christmas when a lump appeared in his neck at the same time as a throat infection. He received antibiotics from his GP and the lump seemed to almost dissapear. Unfortunately, the lump began to appear again over a couple of months and his GP did blood tests, sent him for an ultrasound scan which were all coming back with 'nothing sinister' in the words of his GP. My dad actually asked for further tests to be conducted as he wasn't happy with what they were saying.
He was referred to the ENT department in March who took an aspiration from the lump....that came back inconclusive so a week later they took a further aspiration. We were all really worried by this point and I attended the follow up appointment 2 weeks later with him for them to tell us it was inconclusive again and they needed to arrange for the same test to be done under an ultrasound. I felt so angry that they had taken 2 weeks to arrange this and why hadn't they done this the 2nd time? The doctor seemed concerned that it may be cancerous but didn't think any further tests were needed at the time.
The biopsy was finally taken under an ultrasound last friday which now show some cancerous cells. I asked for the doctor to call me as I live in yorkshire and my mam and dad live in teeside and i needed to hear it for myself as my mam and dad were in shock. The doctor explained that they found squamous cell carcinoma in the biopsy but needed to conduct a PET/CT scan to see if its 'hiding' anywhere and we are due to see them on Wednesday following a MDT meeting tomorrow.
Because they have been so in-efficient regarding the diagnosis, I feel like i need to be constantly chasing up what they are doing. I called the secretary of my dads consultant this morning who has no clue whats going on but has advised me she will try and contact the doctor today and get back to me...
That didn't give me much reassurance so I called the radiology department who have no referral for my dad as yet for a CT scan.
I spoke to a macmillan nurse via the helpline who advised me to chase this up again with the secretary which i have done and Ive also made a compliant to the PALS department.
This weekend was possibly the worst weekend of my life. I spent the weekend with my family and I have never seen my dad look so worried. My mam is trying to be strong but cries everytime its just me and her. I'm trying my best to be strong too but I fear the worst and we just need to know what the extent of this is.
It might sound selfish but my husband to be and I have just bought a house together in Yorkshire and are planning our wedding next year. I cant help but think he might not be here to give me away and to see us into our own house.
I cant imagine loosing my dad so young and I'm scared about how my mam is going to cope with all of this.
Sorry for the essay but I just need some reassurance and reading other people's blogs makes me realise im not alone in this. It just doesn't seem fair.
