Facing up to reality

Hi Danniwilson88

 

It is a very worrying time for you I can understand that.  The hospital do seem to be messing about about rather a bit.  My dad died unexpectedly in January and we are devastated but worse still my mum was taken ill in April and has now been diagnosed with lung cancer, spread to hilar lymph node and now awaiting biopsy results for throat.  It is a nightmare.  However, they have ben very quick with all appointments etc so far.  My mum had a PET scan done which highlighted the lung, lymph node in chest and throat.  Last Weds she had a general anaesthetic and a biopsy taken of her throat (pyriform fossa) it isn't looking at all good.  Now on Friday she is having a CT scan I suppose to see if there is anymore spread of the cancer and then we will no doubt go back to the macmillan unit next week for the final and very distressing diagnosis of it all.  It is an awful thing to have to go through and I can understand your concerns, however try to be strong until you have the complete picture as to what is going on.  many cancers are treatable, even curable so there is hope.  Have they told you what part of the throat they think the cancer is in??  They need to get a move on and get the PET scan done soon as possible, my mum's was done very quick.  Not many hospitals have a PET scanner so you may need to travel to another hospital for it.

Take care and I will send you a friend request and keep in touch if that is OK.

 

Best wishes

Tusk x

Hi Tusk, Thanks for your reply. The lump is in his lymph node to the left side of his neck just under his jaw. They don't know as yet until the CT scan if it's coming from somewhere else. He is well in himself though and has no other symptoms. I've made a complaint via the PALS department who have told me that they will chase it up with them as well. We just need to know what's happening so we can deal with it. So sorry to hear about your mum and dad. I hope the news isn't as bad as your expecting. You must be going through a really tough time. It's hard to believe that these things happen to so many people. Thinking of you and your family. Dani.

Hi Dani,

It seems to be a recurring issue where cancer is concerned I'm afraid. I didn't find out my own diagnosis until about 3 weeks after having the first lump removed and was assured it wasn't cancer right up until it was. Even after the diagnosis there have been 8 weeks of tests before I was told what they needed to do and to be honest as hard as it is to deal with, this is not necessarily a bad thing. When my mother in law had cancer, she went in and was told to go to hospital immediately because the prognosis wasn't good. I've waited because they want to know exactly what's going on and the prognosis is good. I know it's not particularly reassuring. I imagine they try not to worry people unduly but it does get better. The waiting is awful but once you get past that bit you can focus on what will be done to treat him.

You're bound to worry and I've seen enough horrified looks on people's faces now to know that immediately the worst case scenario goes through the head of anyone caring about a person with cancer. There is a lot they can do though so whilst you're going to have a tough time for a while, there is plenty of support on hand through Macmillan.

I hope your dad gets his results and treatment plan arranged soon.

Lottie xx

Hi Dani

I know its early days yet, but please don't start losing faith just yet!  You have a long haul in front of you all and you will need your strength to hold everyone together. Last year my husband had a small lump in his neck (like your dad) which was the size of a pea - we thought it was due to a cold and it wasn't until it got to golf ball size that he mentioned it again to me!  Rushed off to GP who was brilliant and got him referred to the wonderful St Lukes Centre at Guildford.  He was supposed to have exploratory surgery but they found he also had a cancer on his tonsil (the primary site) which had spread to the lymph node in his neck - hence the appearance of the lump.  We didn't know until months later that the tonsil cancer was too large to operate on.  He had a 6 week course of radiotherapy and chemo (this is the hardest, cruellest treatment ever) but we both survived the nightmare and he is now officially "clear" and he is almost back to eating nearly everything - the only souvenir is lack of saliva which we manage to cope with plenty of water and careful choices when eating out - many chefs are only too pleased to add a little more butter or milk to mashed potatoes or offer extra gravy etc.  There are many other blogs on here which will give you hope from members who have had and survived the dreaded "neck" cancers - they are all so different, the treatment received causes so many different side effects and the various hospitals around the country all seem to have their own agendas!  Keep your chin up and sending you and your family loads and loads of love and hugs xxxxxxxxxxxxxx

Debs

Hello Dani.

I'm sorry to read about your Dad and the difficult time you are having.  Have you found the Head & Neck Group on the site yet?  You might find it helps to join that.  There are many of us who have been through treatment.  I personally had a neck lump which was a squamous cell carcinoma, and there are others in the group who have had similar. 

Take care x