Not the news I wanted

Hello zappaman,

I think you are right F**K cancer. I was in the supermarket today buying myself a baby's toothbrush, and I had a strange thought...how many people are walking around here with cancer? The statistics are high, probably quite a few, and a few who don't even know they have it.

Then I thought, whatever happens I am in good hands now and people are trying their very best for me, so the least I can do is to not waste a minute, there's sod all I can do if the egg timer is going to empty a little faster for me. I will have at least been given more time with my family.

I'm absolutely devastated that you didn't get the news you wanted, I was sat in the chemo chair wondering if you had been for the results. Its crazy really, we 'talk' to people on here, who are in effect complete strangers, but we are all 'rooting' for each other, hoping for the best, in this crazy parallel world we are existing in. There's a complete understanding and honesty here and thats comforting when you need it.

I'm not looking at statistics, there are always the exceptions to the rule, I'm got to hang round a little longer, I've got some evening out to do! (In the nicest possible way)

My husband is sitting looking for somewhere to go in our motor home for a few days, just somewhere locally,

I didn't think I'd want to ever go in it again, it was our treat earlier in the year, we'd had them before, but work got in the way the last six years, and as we were planning on taking it easier and taking some time to ourselves we went mad and got it. The day we picked it up was the day of my recall....that was when it all began, so Ive never been relaxed in it, the few times we've been away, but suddenly, yes I want to go, to have something nice to look forward to, and for him too, he needs to relax, its all been a trial for him too.

What a man I married, I am blessed. He's been there all the way...and he hates needles.

Zappaman , we've just got to keep putting one foot in front of the other and dealing with each stage in the best way we can, as it comes along, sometimes I just slip my mind into neutral when things get too difficult, and just deal with that second, that minute, and then suddenly I'm through it.

I'm sorry for rambling on, maybe chemo brain, thats my excuse, but just remember, there's alway the exception to the rule, why not you?

Sending a warm hug and a bucket full of hope to you and your family.

JM, thanks for your kind thoughts and hugs, good to see your spirits are up. You are right that we are all strangers but the support and ability to have a release to rant on this site is great! Some people are further down the road on this journey none of us have chosen but, have been forced into. Their individual experience can help us all and maybe we make a contribution in some small way. It has lifted my spirits to see you are enjoying life a little bit more than when you started your journey. Wherever you and your husband decide to go in the motorhome have a great time. Whatever comes my way now I feel much stronger to deal with, and having a wonderful wife supporting me gives me great comfort, as I'm sure you have a similar relationship with your husband . We will march onwards and upwards until we can march no more. Thanks again and hugs and best wishes to you and your family.