Capital F

Hi Hun

Your doing so well , we all have days that we feel like this ride is never going to end but it will end and your get off the ride a stronger person, the old  you has never left its just been replaced by the worrying and stressed you  . Think of it as the dips in the rollercoaster they have to come back and so will you .

I'm sorry you don't get to see your family as much as you would like too  , both my older kids flew the nest last year so I know how it feels to not see them all the time but for me it makes the time I do see them that bit more special .

I bet if you sat a good fried down and talked to them they would give you nothing but hugs and support its ok to be upset and its better to get these things off your chest and let them simmer and weigh you down . You know were all here to talk and give online hugs and I understand its not the same as a personal hug , maybe see if there's anyone local to you on the group that you could meet up with .

I recently joined a great group on facebook , its called UK Breast Cancer support group . The ladies on there are so fantastic and support each other and there's a lot of positive's  on the group that make you smile its helped me no end .

I am always on the end of a pm if you want to chat .

Maria xxxx

I'm glad you posted this. I think it's important to keep a record of all our feelings so that we can reflect and help ourselves come to terms with our emotions, even when we're going through a trough.

Janette, It just shows you despite the fact that we are going through different cancers and at different stages the thought processes are still the same. It might be the time of year for I have been having a few down days myself, sometimes thinking what's the point. I know I will never be able to eat as much as I used to and can't satisfy my sweet tooth because it will make me ill. I then read what some other patients of oesophageal cancer have been through, or are going through (Allan 64) for example and I count my blessings. So don't be so hard on yourself it's quite normal to have down days and be gloomy, then something nice a picture of your grandson for instance warms your heart and things don't seem so bad. You know you will get through this and it will take time to heal the mental trauma as well as the physical trauma, but we will get there regardless of how long it takes. Virtual hugs and best wishes to you and your family.

Kind regards Frank

PS when I said we I mean All who are going through it