Finishing
Finished work today
For a month
Or two
Or six
Or a year
Or forever
Return date unknown
Treatment starts Monday
Surgery - tick
Radiotherapy - tick
More Surgery - ? – Unknown
More radiotherapy - ? - Unknown
Chemotherapy - ? - Unknown
Hormone therapy - ? - Unknown
So many unknowns
I will be different
Can’t stop the change
Can’t know the unknowns
No point in the fear
Yet it remains
Sometimes a tiny, insignificant fleeting thought
Sometimes a sobbing nightmare
But never screaming, never shouting
‘The look’ is within me and I am ‘the look’
And that is okay;
The empathy and sympathy and fear of others, it comes from a place of care and love
I am not so alone now
A part of me is finishing
A part of me is starting
I am learning to embrace ‘the look’
I will learn to embrace the unknowns
Still scared though
