So after losing mum to Gallbladder cancer just over a month ago my life has been devastated
We finally got to have her funeral last Tuesday after such a long wait and the day went without any hitches and mum would have been proud.
Up to Tuesday I was some what holding it together and wasn't sure how but once I was standing there in the chapel this sense of doom came over me
My mum was gone
My best friend
My person
She was never coming back and that is something I am struggling to cope with
If I think about it this feeling wells up inside me and my head feels like it's going to explode
Returning back to work today to comments like well you knew this day was coming and time to get on with it!!!! I very nearly threw my laptop across the room
The only reason I'm there is because if I stayed at home(which I want to do) I wouldn't go back out that door
I just can't imagine life without my wonderful mum in it and I am full of anger and jealously and very much wishing I could be with her
