Long day at work today, got so much to do, feels like I've put it first, but need to spend some time helping sort things for an audit. Some unexpected rule changes have come to light and s**t could be hitting the fan. Failing the audit could mean problems for us, big problems, so selfishly I'm thinking long term. Can't afford to have to think about having to find another job. Managed to go a little early, so got to mum at 4.45, and spent a couple of hours with mum. She's hooked up to morphine now, so drifting in and out of sleep. It's nice to just watch her though.
Went food shopping after visiting mum, had several texts off husband whilst I was there, one of them jokey. He was at the pub. He's oblivious to the stress I am in. Got back & son had left tv on full blast, playing some 'music' he's into. It was then that i lost it and broke down. I think it's time my family realise I'm not superwoman and I need their help. This makes me feel guilty, and again, indulgent. It's not about me.
