I'm started to get back into running again, By jumping in the deep end and doing a Marathon in September the Berlin Marathon. I have done Marathons before but not for a few years now. Ever since my Dad had cancer I couldn't focus on doing any more running event's. I felt that was over before and after he died. When he was alive I was doing half marathons and 10k's but I couldn't stay focused enough, So I stopped. I still trained but wasn't running much. When he died I was lost and didn't know what to do, But I just kept keeping busy and working etc. I was all over the place at times, I have lost some friends because of that, Some are still with me, I felt it was my fault that I lost them the way I was. Things in my head I couldn't control or stop. I was a mess at times and down and depressed. I felt I wanted to end my own life the way I was behaving, But I kept going until I could get out and find the light at the end of the tunnel, Which I did a year later, It took a while, As someone said it would take time and they were right. Now that I'm over the grieving of my dad, I can move on and do the things I want to do and think of the past. My dad would want me to be happy and do things and not be down. So getting back into running again and doing things that my dad had done around the house etc. I feel good now and happy. I've entered the Berlin Marathon on the 24th September this year. So far so good on my training, I'm not looking to get a PB just crossing the finish line is all I want to do and enjoy the run and atmosphere there. Other trips I have planned after Berlin a holiday in Las Vegas and next year Disney World Florida with my family. These are holidays not Marathons lol. Berlin will be my last.
Some of you are going through emotions and heart ake, Pain and many other things. These are all normal you feel like your alone and lost, Don't give up keep going, See Macmillan or doctor or someone you can talk to, If not do it your way the way you feel comfortable. It will get better, Not over night, Next week or month it will take time. It will get easier and when that does you will feel different you might not but I did. They will always be watching over you. Keep going.
Thank you for reading.
Wayne.
