waiting, guilty, sad update

Less than one minute read time.

We had a good few years but last year the cancer spread to his spine and he was in agony walking round with a broken back, he had two major ops putting rods and cage around his spine, they couldn't remove all the tumour and they "poked the beast" and in September we were told he would end in a wheelchair very soon, ok, we can deal with that and prepared for it. Over new year he ended up in Christies with pneumonia and pleurisy, then home, then back in with flu, then home but on the 8th Jan he fell, back in Christies and on the 13th Jan told he was terminal with just a few months to live. He very quickly became paralysed from the chest down, is doubly incontinet, riddles with tumours, on oxygen and now been given weeks, we are now just waiting.....

Anonymous
  • FormerMember
    FormerMember

    We are the same age as you so I can imagine, but not really take on your pain. DH has multiple myeloma and at first when told has has cancer in the spine I imagined the worst. We have been blessed and though imobile he is likely to be able to live with it.

    Prayers for you, may your waiting involve some special moments for you both.

  • FormerMember
    FormerMember

    He's slept all day today, I've sat in the conservatory watching, I can't go out as if he wakes he wants someone there (which is now only one of our two boys or his mum, none of whom were around today) he's awake now, we will have tea and he will fall asleep again, feel lonely

  • FormerMember
    FormerMember

    Had my friends funeral on Wednesday, lots of mutual friends there all asking after Paul, what could I say, he's dying, I know people's hearts are in the right place but struggling with constant requests on how he is, so awkward as people actually don't want or can't handle the truth

  • FormerMember
    FormerMember

    Had a bad night, Paul's got a cough and very chesty, waiting for out of hours docotr, think he has a chest infection, he looks so unwell, I've given him loads of pain relief and he's on his oxygen, he just reminded me that he said years ago he didn't want to die like this, slowly, painfully, why can't he peacefully slip away, this is all so cruel, I'm starting to pray he goes as its awful all this

    Waiting, guilty, sad.....

  • FormerMember
    FormerMember

    He did have a chest infection and then got a severe bout of thrush, poor guy, he's recovered now but still very tired, doesn't really want visitors but his family keep insisting on coming and seeing him even when I tell them he's asleep, or not well. He hates the way they stare at him, he's not an animal in the zoo!