Well I think this is gonna be a long blog, but sometimes it is easier to write than talk. Talking is hard it brings tears and emotions that I can not deal with. I am 65 now and have dealt with more crap than most but this latest roller coaster ride has got to be the worst ever.
My partner Sharon is only 53, a right tough South London bird with the biggest heart you could wish for. Family, is Sharon's main concern, Good or bad Sharon will be there, give them stick, give them love give them hugs, end of, good or bad Sharon will be there, got your back and always puts herself at the back of the queue.
I will not list all the hard times that she has had to deal with over the last 10 years, but she never waivered she was just Sharon.
We together turned the corner, life was better, holidays were good, life was looking very good.
Everything after some really tough years was going in the right direction.
Then BOOM 2016 chucked us the hardest curve ball ever, Devastating, out of our control. Nothing to look forward to.
Sharon smoked heavy, had COPD, loved a drink and the fun that went along with it.
She felt a bit unwell, got a cough and when walking was really short of breath, even struggled to get to the doctors.
Sharon got to the doctors 3 times in July and August, said no problems, no infection nothing to worry about. Did they mess up or what, they didn't even send her for an X-ray knowing that she was COPD, in fact the last X-ray was in 2012.
Well getting the all clear we went to Dorset on holiday, settled in nicely, getting ready for a good time, no, Sharon went downhill fast and I took her to Dorchester Hospital. Wow how good is that hospital, within the hour she was in majors and every test imaginable was being done.
Then that's when it all started, X ray showed a growth about the size of a Lemon, our hearts sunk, we knew and for the first time ever I see a tear run down Sharon's Cheek.
We looked on the bright side but our guts told us what to expect, we knew it was not good, the Hospital done Scans and normal stuff and the waiting started. Always waiting, its the worse. Nothing straight but always waiting.
We got home, went to see the doctors, because this all happened in Dorchester the 14 day rules does not apply it only applies from now. What a bunch of jobsworths. So we have to start all over again, .
Too late, couple of days later Sharon is in hospital, Pneumonia set in, Lung collapsed, and tests confirm the worst. After a couple of weeks sent home, still poorly but got to take her to London for Cryotherapy and see what happens.
Ok that gets done, then Bang another infection, Sepsis, now that's some serious shit. I can not tell you what was going through my head, Sharon was on another planet and all I wanted was her back to normal.
Well she done well, what a fighter and back home again. Then normal Oncologist stuff, ifs, buts and maybes but Chemo is the road.
Ok Chemo started then Boom again another infection, pneumonia then sepsis and weeks in hospital. How much more she gotta take, loads more to come yet. But they don't tell us what to expect.
Well we are now in December, Lung collapsed, No more Chemo, Oxygen 24/7, loads of meds, and the best on offer is Palliative Radiotherapy and still no information on what to expect. Tho they are very good at detailing the prognosis from 12 months to 6.
Radiotherapy done now and I would say it has gotta be the worst ever, Sick all the time, weight loss, stopped eating and so much pain. When does it end?????
Now, just for a change we got to wait, weeks of waiting, has it helped, how long to go, can we make plans,
This is one roller coaster I want to get off. there is no happy ending.
