Feb 2017
My story so far...
I am one in eight. You won't see me on an ad campaign or in a magazine, yet there are thousands like me.
I had stage 1 breast cancer in early 2014, not many people know about it. Even some of my family and friends don't know - my fight, my choice. Those who do know kept it to themselves for me.
My cancer was picked up by my first routine mammogram, I was 51 at the time.
I had no lump or other symptoms so feel very lucky that I was in the right place at the right time.
From the mammograms to biopsy to operations they moved swiftly, I had ultra sounds, more mammograms and met with specialists within days.
2 operations and radiotherapy sorted me out.
I wanted to get through it my way - I'm a very private person, but also didn't want to become the next 'cause' to be talked about. (Something happened in work close to my diagnosis that made me want to keep this information to a very tight group of people. It was a lot to ask of them and I am grateful every day for their support, they have been amazing and kept my secret).
This made my treatment and recovery so much easier. I didn't want the 'sympathetic head bob' when people looked at me, I didn't want them to think 'poor you' as I walked past. I have always hated fuss and so this was my way to get through, it's my fight not theirs and this was my control.
Many have told 'white lies' on my behalf but I'm so grateful to have such fabulous people in my life who gave me the type of support I needed to get on with it and feel as normal as possible. (I have another condition so we just stretched the truth a bit!).
I do realise how selfish I was in asking them all to not share my 'news' and as my life moves forward, I am forever grateful.
I can see the effect this had on my daughter, but she was so lucky to have the support of her partner and friends, which in turn supported me too and gave me a focus so I didn't dwell on the negatives but kept positivity in my life.
When you go through cancer, it opens your eyes and makes you put things in perspective. A few things during radiotherapy made me so grateful for my life.
You tend to see the same people in the waiting room every day, as your course of treatment is booked in a block of how many weeks you need and most appointments are around the same time each day. There were a few occasions I felt a bit of a fraud. I had cancer but not on the scale of many other patients. I saw people who were giving their all fighting this disease, some doing better than others.
For anyone diagnosed with cancer, it is life changing, whatever the prognosis.
My hopes are that one day everyone gets the all clear news - it's the most amazing feeling.
I've been clear of cancer for nearly 3 years now, and hope I will stay that way. I am in the system now so will be monitored every 6 months for 5 years. There's so many people who aren't that lucky.
I'm writing this for a couple of reasons.
First, so I don't forget or ever take for granted the amazing support I received from my daughter who has been my rock, my family, close friends and also the staff at Clatterbridge Cancer Centre - My treatment was the best I could have wished for. And the Macmillan nurses who are always there if you need them, from diagnosis right through to recovery, anything you need they are there for you.
Second, so that maybe in sharing my experience and it will help someone, even if in just a small way.
And so to anyone who has fundraised by wearing pink, done a sponsored event, had a cake sale, etc I'd like to just say, you've helped save my life so thank you.
That's my story so far. I try to stay positive, try to have the best outlook on life as possible and smile whenever I can.
