So 2 weeks to this day I was diagnosed with bowel cancer. In the rectum to be exact literally a right pain in the ass. As a 3cm polyp was removed I thought yey the pain in my ass has finally been taken out but no it still a right pain. So I knew when consultant called me in it wouldn't be to wish me well and say sorry but we won't be developing a relationship. My husband on the other hand did have this view but maybe he wished that because after all I'm lucky my consultant is very pleasant on the eye apparently as all my mum kept saying was how can someone look so handsome in scrubs. To say the last 2 weeks have been a roller coaster is understatement. I've gone from writing letters in my head to my daughter on each of her birthdays, wedding day, exam days...she is currently 21 months old to maybe the consultant got it wrong and its just ibs after all I do have anxiety and the tiredness well everyone I talk to says being a mum is exhausting and back again to should I plan my funeral to no its definitely all in my head. So right now I'm waiting to hear from the multidisciplinary team. And whether the extreme bodily functions are due to the cancer if it is actually even that, maybe they did get it wrong or to complete anxiety at what I will be told next. So my daughters word at minute is UP UP UP for everything so my attitude is going to be UP UP UP whether it is cancer although pretty sure they wouldn't lie to just incase they did we as a family will move upwards to the next step conquer that and then up to the next step always looking up in front not behind us xxx
