Hi - well second lot of chemo done and dusted - Paul didnt seem too bad during the actual feeding in of the chemo - it is the days after that take their toll - and it is hard for Paul as he wants to try and get out and do the kids sport etc and I hate to try and stop it as I dont want him to sit at home day in day out - but it does take its toll on him - Friday we had Jacks cross country and it was freezing cold - and we had to walk a fair distance from where we parked the car to the grandstand - that tired him but the time we got home - and then yesterday (Sunday) he had organised a big friends get together at our local RSL Club - and he really suffered big time - just tired and weak - but he kept a brave face fo 3.5 hours - his sister is saying that he shouldnt be doing all these sorts of things but I cant stop him - he is an adult and should know the limits his body has - I am hoping he is seeing how far he can push himself - but I cant tell him not to do things - we are both trying very hard to live life as normally as we can - and believe you me it is far from normal at home - he just says he is too weak to do anything - so it is a third child for me - annoys me every now and then as I am sure he could help with some little minor things at home - not talking vacuuming or anything - maybe putting the margarine away, picking up his socks etc - but am trying my best not to nag at him as I know he is not feeling well - but then when he does want to get out of the house I dont say "no Paul - you are not well enough" - I would hate it if it was me and someone was telling me what I should and shouldn't be doing - I am getting frustrated that his diabetes levels are not going down - up in 20's again at the weekend -and he has been so good with no sugar intake etc - he also is finding sleep a non-occurrence - he just cant sleep - he has been given sleeping tablets which dont do very much - except make him dopey the following day - to the extent that he drove me and the boys 1 km up the road on Saturday and I didnt know he had popped two sleeping pills the nite before - he was off his head - had a real go at him about not doing that again - to tell me what medication he has taken - as that is the last thing we need to happen - a car accident!! I can at the end of the day only "advise" him what to do - what not to do - meet my husband and you will understand my reasoning a little more - and those who know him - you will understand!!
I am finding I am getting tired with the constant housework and rushing around - it just gets to me every now and then - the kids push me to my limits and Paul is not there to back me up - and not really getting a day "off" as the days off from work have been taken up with driving to and from hospital etc - ah well - shouldn't be complaining - things could be a lot worse - went out last nite with some girlfriends to see Mama Mia at the movies - had a bite to eat first - had a ball - mite have to try a bit more of that every now and then - had the boys bathed and fed and nothing left to do for Paul -
Just been on the phone to get an appointment for him to see his doctor today to try and sort the diabetes out - it is ridiculous- surely something can be done for him - just spoke to him on the phone and he sounded like a zomby -
Makes my tummy churn to see him change so much for the "out there" person he was to what he is now - am feeling physically sick.
Will get back to this tomorrow where hopefully we can get some help with the sugar levelsxx
FormerMember
hey tan, well you know what I think. Tell that sister of his to come and live with him for a while or pull her head in. Chin up girly, let me know when I can help.
I can only sympathise. Actually, I can do more than that. I think he is being just a bit selfish. My husband is the carer, or should I say supervisor. He wouldn't countenance my doing anything much on the day of chemo or the day after. Then if I wanted to do anything else, I had to justify it. A two hour evening meeting was OK, as long as I went to bed straight afterwards. Even now, two months after the chemo finished, he complains if I am out for two days. Even with a day's rest in between.
I would suggest that you have a talk with him, establishing some goal posts. He needs rest. Not sleep, rest. You could agree on a level of activity. But when he is about the house, he could clear up after himself. Chucking socks in the laundry bin. Bet he can't get both in from 10 feet away!
As for going out to have fun, he has to pace himself. It is important for his diabetes. I think chemo affects the response to the therapy. My blood tests show inconsistently with how I feel. (Different endocrine, but the principle may hold good). Should he go and see his diabetic specialist?
