Post 551: The holiday is officially postponed, it’s a bit of a blow.
With the news of our choice to abandon the holiday up north my feelings of the walls closing in are increasing.
My world is shrinking steadily but the recent changes are significant. Not being able to travel due to my back pain and stiff neck is temporary perhaps and a postponement is logical for all reasonings. But the medical walls are also closing in with less and less medication and treatment I’m given to choose from. This is natural and something I’ve known was coming for ages but now it’s here I’m not ready for it.
When I was looking online for any data on Radium and its effects and side effects I nearly drew a blank.
It’s not the most written about treatment and even on the Macmillan online forum there is very little to read about it, from the point of view of a patient or doctors and research. That makes it harder to understand what it’ll do to me physically and the knock on mental health, but there little to do.
It’s left me with uncertainty about how it’ll affect the family both at Christmas and in general after the baby .
Yes I’m going over the same ground as per usual but I’m edging towards an answer that seems to be well camouflaged. So well camouflaged in fact, I loose sight of it completely.
Maybe Thursday evening with our youngest and the mama-to-be will help me significantly.
On an otherwise quiet day I did have a bit of taxiing to do. My Darling had one of those cardiology tests where you are assessed while you’re on a treadmill in a special monitoring clinic. So I had a while waiting for her in the sunny carpark and the thoughts I had about reading were all forgotten as I sat and dozed, ha ha.
When considering the slap on the wrist I get every morning from IWatch it’s not surprising that I try to doze any time I can, and sometimes it’s impossible to stop and an involuntary nap is just what I need.
My sleeping habits are now set and undesirable but for now, just the way it is.
My Darling came springing out the test which she had passed with flying colours. According to the assistant, she had no worries about the numbers and with some advice on the meds. That is the best mews ever and something that will help her relax about her own body with the background of her family health traits.
It’s brilliant news for both of us.
I wanted to get back to work today but had uncertainty about the pains I had and I didn’t want to make things worse. In the end I survived ok and the two hours I sat comfortably in my special adapted chair.
The two hours flew by and the 5pm finish was now in the twilight of the changed timezone. Everyone’s car lights were on as the sun set somewhere in the west, out of sight.
So another day zooms by and tomorrow morning I get to sit in the parlour for some more of my artwork on my wildlife sleeve, which is making me smile inside.
And…
That’s all folks!
Oh one more thing, the pain in my back is easing slightly, but the neck is as stiff as very stiff board. But progress is progress and I feel that there’s hope with the Duloxatine.
Take care and I hope you get to smile as much as me with my tats…
PS
An evening with the Millibobs tonight at another local pub for a Sussex dinner, can’t wait.
