Post 441: Should I tell you? Maybe later, after lunch.
I had an appointment today, a phone one, from the GP, but it came as a surprise.
I’ll mention the unmentionables, but not to start with – a sore bum is more of a kid’s problem, isn’t it?
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Mr Vicious looks like a cheetah lately. I don’t know whether I should worry. He looks as though he’s not 12 years old at all, more like a sleek six-year-old. Healthy, I think, but slim.
You know the type of cat that has no tummy when you look down on him from above. Perhaps it’s just a summer thing, a summer waisting, and the heat has shed his excess weight. I’d better weigh him.
I did notice a scab under his chin today. Maybe he’s been scrapping with another local cat who wants a piece of him. I’ll keep a good lookout. I don’t want the old boy feeling uncomfortable.
Talking of which, I’m sitting down to more meals than usual and the outcome has been great, although my waistband is beginning to complain. My weight has dramatically increased and I’m back to eleven and a half stone. A perfect start to the day.
For some reason I still can’t stop eating, and I’m rather enjoying it too. I’m eating anything: chocolates (of course), three proper meals a day again, snacks when visitors come round (although they’re few and far between), and while shopping for household essentials I somehow found time to grab some jelly sweets first.
Now, I didn’t intend those jelly men and fruit pastilles to land in my basket before anything sensible, but how can I resist?
It’s not me – it’s the AI-designed supermarket layout putting all the naughty stuff in front of me before I reach the healthier shelves.
Should I have walked straight past without blinking, like a racehorse with blinkers on to stop him watching the crowds applause, and me focused only on buying kitchen bits and household essentials?
How very boring… ha ha.
My bowels still aren’t behaving themselves. I suppose that’s hardly surprising after only just getting my appetite back. Things are settling into a new routine, but for the last few days there’s been an awkward nuisance that means I’m forever reaching for the toilet paper. It’s uncomfortable rather than painful, and I’m hoping that once I’m back to eating three proper meals a day everything will settle down naturally.
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As time passes since the vehicles were sold, I think I’m slowly getting over the loss.
It might sound childish, but the Volvo represented something much bigger than just a car. It symbolised the retirement we’d imagined together – gentle days out, little adventures and enjoying life at a slower pace.
So after breakfast I found myself thinking about Monday, when our great friends from the world of vehicles are coming over for elevenses. Just tea, biscuits and a good natter.
I hope I’ll hold it together.
It’ll certainly test my spirit.
And with that, the GP surgery rang.
“Hello, is that Mr U?… I’m Dr Jaz.”
After the usual security questions he asked, “Do you know why I’ve called?”
I started guessing.
“My shoulder? The recent medication? My heart? One of those?”
“No,” he interrupted, putting me out of my misery. “It’s the pain in your left shoulder. Is it troubling you now?”
I told him no, because the right shoulder is the painful one these days, which left me completely confused.
He soon explained.
The X-ray on my left shoulder had shown further metastatic disease around the scapula. The rest of the bones showed the usual signs of ageing, and in his opinion the discomfort could be due to either normal wear and tear or the cancer itself.
Oddly enough, I felt reassured.
At least I understood what was going on.
He suggested Oncology review the images from their perspective and decide whether a little radiotherapy might be worthwhile if the pain became troublesome.
We finished the call with me understanding everything clearly, and his advice to contact the Oncology team.
So, I sat down and sent an email message to the Oncology team.
Dear Dr S,
Can you comment at next week’s three-monthly oncology appointment on the following…
I listed the usual things: pains, aches and my worries about continued deterioration, while recognising that I’m on Active Surveillance because I’ve chosen living life over more treatment – and I still believe that’s the right decision for me.
Yes, the bones will continue to weaken, and anyone suggesting future treatments will need to convince me there’s real benefit, because my mind is made up about chemotherapy. That’s a definite “no ta.”
A little radiotherapy may be different, but only if the pain becomes significant.
Meanwhile, my other shoulder – the right one – with all its frozen shoulder treatment and physiotherapy is finally beginning to improve again after I overdid the exercises last week.
I’m longing to be able to get in and out of the shower, or pull on a T-shirt, without wincing.
I’m nearly there.
Hurrah!
My weight…
Another hurrah!
Six pounds back on is absolutely fabulous. It’ll help everything, but more importantly it means I’m beginning to feel normal around food again.
I’m even looking forward to a proper dinner or takeaway.
Which means tomorrow, when Big Sis comes over for our usual catch-up and takeaway, I can sit and tuck in with everyone else instead of being the odd one out.
The week since last Saturday’s wedding has been full of family adventures for them.
Instead of heading off to Northern Ireland to spend time with their youngest son and his family – and enjoy that wonderful garden that’s a garden centre more than a family garden – they’ve stayed home instead.
Lucky for us.
That means they can come here instead, and we can spend the evening chatting about the fantastic wedding photographs that keep appearing.
The Bride and Groom are now in Greece enjoying a well-earned honeymoon, and we couldn’t be happier for them.
What wonderful memories they’ve given us all.
After sending my emails I honestly didn’t expect to hear anything until next week.
But, lo and behold…
Perfect replies came back almost immediately.
Everything I’d asked about would be followed up through Oncology, and with their encouragement things could move forward much sooner than I’d imagined.
Brilliant.
I really wasn’t expecting that.
It clearly matters to them as much as it matters to me, and that’s a lovely feeling.
Let’s leave things on that high note.
Let’s enjoy the weekend.
Oh… and Mrs U, my Darling, made it into town today.
She managed the weigh-in, the café afterwards and the journey home with the help of a walking stick and her lovely friends.
She came back absolutely delighted after losing another pound and a half.
Unfortunately, those yellow bruises on her calf had puffed up again, and by the time she got home she needed the whole afternoon to recover.
Yes, it was worth it…
…but she definitely won’t be working this weekend.
That calf still needs plenty more rest.
So, goodnight.
Take care.
