Post 35: Tiredness, tea and travel.
Vital Statistics
Mood: Mostly at ease 
Anything else: Bloomin’ roadworks
⸻
I’m very tired today — but I don’t know why.
This morning, I drove My Darling into town for my rescheduled chemo blood test and, as a treat, promised to take her out to lunch at our favourite café — conveniently just a short step from the GP surgery. Two birds, one stone and not too far for me to walk. Great.
The usual practice nurse took my bloods with her usual diligence in the usual treatment room.
A few pleasantries later, My Darling and I were on our way away from the surgery— hand in hand — heading toward the bustling shopping precinct to find filling food.
We found a couple of empty seats in the café, and while we waited for our food, I glanced at my phone. There were a few notifications from the prostate forum.
Yesterday I’d posted to ask my fellow travellers if anyone else had bilateral prostate cancer like me (just in the the bones and prostate). Brilliant, a few replies were coming in — and as I suspected, I’m not alone.
This wasn’t only about reassurance. I asked the question because I wanted to quietly reassess the treatments I’ve had compared to others, with new eyes — discovering how others, with similar issues to mine have been treated and how they’re fairing.
Obviously we as humans are very different even when we think we’re the same, such are the complexities of the human body, but for me this is more a straw poll for my own use not a scientific research paper for publication.
All at once the all-day breakfast and chicken salad arrived, and my attention rightly returned to the lunch and My Darling sitting opposite me — whom I’d rudely ignored for a while, while I was researching. We tucked in, chatted idly, and did our usual people-watching… all while being subtly people-watched ourselves I’m sure. Fair enough.
We were only a few forkfuls into the grub when some friends walked in, happily waving as they spotted us. They joined us for a quick cuppa — which turned into a 30-minute catch-up filled with tales of divorce dramas and arrangements for their cat-sitter, while they swan off to Tuscany… (yes indeed; that holiday).
After hugs and goodbyes, My Darling headed for the superstore, and I made my apologies and sloped back to the car for a rest.
Boy, I was knackered.
I tried reclining the passenger seat for a snooze, but it wasn’t happening. Too hot, even being in the shade beneath the old oak trees beside the parish church didn’t help. The windows were fully down but only letting in a slight breeze, the shoppers trundled by with laden trollies but I just couldn’t settle.
I was still puzzled as to where my energy had vanished to?
I’d eaten well. Slept okay; if you ignore the pee-wake-ups from yesterday’s two-litre water marathon, and earlier at the surgery the medical-vampire hadn’t taken too much blood… Maybe the weekend’s worries had finally pulled the rug from under me. Who knows?
After a while, I heard a soft voice I knew so well — it was My Darling peering through the open window.
“I’m back,” she smiled.
She hopped in, and as she drove off for the short ride home, she said,
“You go upstairs and sleep a while when we get back — rest, so you’re ok for the visit to Big Sis’, oh! and I’ve bought them a little pressie and it’s not food, just like you wanted”.
When we got home I liked the idea of a nana-nap so much, I did as I was told and went to bed.
⸻
Later on…
My mobile and watch buzzed me awake — a surprise transatlantic call from a dear friend in the southern States.
What followed was a whirlwind conversation: Egypt, Italy, my medical misadventures, growing families, and a dive into some seriously interesting views about education (mostly history and math).
It was an unexpected joy — over an hour long but felt like minutes. It lifted my spirits no end. I felt full of energy. My tiredness had vanished.
So is my tiredness psychosomatic?
Could it be the new pills? (I doubt it). More likely to be chocolate poisoning.
(Yes, I’ve been at the forbidden treats stockpile again.)
At least there’s no tears today, so that’s another positive.
Just one thing left today: an evening visit to my sister and her garden.
Don’t forget to take the pressie, My Darling.
I forgot to mention that this afternoon, I received an email from the Patient Access system— with today’s blood results.
Nothing alarming, or at least nothing alarming to my unqualified eye.
The all-important PSA figure will be given to me F2F next Wednesday at court during the oncologists cross examination of me, my insides and my mind.
I’ll hide behind My Darling if it gets scary.
Still no word on the second opinion. I’ve already planned the what-ifs and wherefores for when it’s ready, which just adds another layer to the worry-pile.
Speaking of other worry’s : My Darling’s blood pressure was high again after we got back from Sis and brother-in-law’s tonight. She’s now in bed, probably waiting for me — while I’m sat here watching a K-drama and scoffing Celebration chocolates (I’m definitely not meant to be eating).
Hopefully she skips this sentence when reading yesterday’s post today,
or her BP will go even higher.
———
The evening visit went well, and before Sis made us some special tea we had a proper wander around their well kept garden.
It was bursting with colour — the tall monkey puzzle tree casting shade over a freshly clipped lawn, orange and black poppies fluttering beside huge globular alliums, lush hostas, and absolutely enormous gunnera leaves with their very prickly stems all creating a real gardener’s delight.
Clearly, Big Sis inherited Dad’s green fingers. No debate there.
As the evening drew to a close, we said our goodbyes.
But the way home wasn’t straightforward — the main road was closed for (long-overdue) pothole repairs. So we took a scenic detour through nearby villages.
Well… it would have been scenic if it weren’t pitch black.
Even the moon looked too tired to help us out — though when it did peep through the trees, it was a large and covered in a quite lovely orange hue.
We had negotiated safely through another day.
A step closer to the answers I so badly need. Heart, clots, chemo?
⸻
I wonder what tomorrow will bring.
Hopefully no more worries.
Forget the blood test.
Forget the blood pressure.
Forget the worries.
Tomorrow will be a good day.
