Post 150: Groundhog Day, again.
Where did the week go? It’s Thursday and I’m convinced it’s Wednesday. Oops! Maybe I’m losing it.
———
Let’s forget about today. Honestly, just re-read yesterday’s blog — yep, really.
Tomorrow, though, is another kettle of fish.
I’m a bit nervous about the early start and long day in the transfusion suite at the local hospital. My Darling will drive me down, but since it’s a Friday, it’s only fair she heads off to the café afterwards to see everyone as usual, while I get through the tests and checks before the two bags of life-giving blood are hooked up.
I haven’t done much research about the procedure. I’m so tired that I’ll simply lie back and take it as it comes. Best to stay calm and leave it to the experts.
Today I rummaged through the wardrobes for my Revival clothes, and finally got the callback from the dentist surgery to postpone the hygienist — small wins.
But truthfully, I’ve been an emotional wreck.
I don’t know what I want — food, drink, rest — nothing quite fits. I feel dozy but don’t want to go to bed. I crave food but don’t want to eat. More than anything, I just want to feel well.
Maybe it’s a phase, or just the anxiety of facing something new with this transfusion. I’m sure I’m fine. I feel fine. I want to be fine. Everything will be fine. Sometimes I wish I were a cat — blissfully unaware of the medical world. Three years of constant information has left me overloaded.
I looked back at photos of the last Revival I went to, in 2022 — just a week before my biopsy. I even carried the newly prescribed hormone pills with me. I knew then that life was about to change, but in those pictures I still looked happy, even with the weight of the breaking news in my pocket.
I wish those cancer cells hadn’t barged in at stage 4 from the outset. But that’s the way the cookie crumbles.
This day shall pass.
I’m still on the bus, and I’m not hopping off.
The next two days will be interesting, and I’m glad they’re happening. I just hope the blood gives me a boost and the rain holds off — but even if it doesn’t, my mate and I will make a good day of it.
Good night, good morning, good day.
