After earlier's unpleasantries Ewa had left and I stayed with Mo for a little longer but I was still quite upset and Ewa probably was too even though I did apologise to Ewa about me over reacting. Unfortunately tensions had been spilt on more than one occasion since everything had happened with Mo,another down side of any Cancer diagnosis I expect.I left the hospice and went home,well next door actually,Sue & Brian have been feeding me as well as keeping an eye on me,their support has been amazing and beyond the remit of any neighbour.I was very quiet during the evening,unusual for me, but I was still suprisingly upset by todays antics and I knew that Paul had been told about it so I was expecting a phone call. The PHONE CALL didnt come but a text did,briefly what it said was Don't take things out on Ewa she only wants to do what she can and personally I think mum eats more when Ewa feeds her. I was livid what total rubbish,so I sent a text back simply saying 'Call me', things needed to be said 'once again' I'm just sick of having to fight them both regarding Mo's care. A text came back 'Sorry mate a bit busy at present' which wound me up even more so I rang him. During a fairly emotive phone call I found out some things I didn't know,I didn't know that Ewa had been giving Mo her food on a regular basis when they visited in the evening and Mo wasn't worried about Ewa doing it at all,in fact she reacted well and even some of the nurses agreed. I didn't know Ewa only visited that particular morning because she had managed to get some time off to visit. I knew none of this when I visited earlier and I told Paul had I known what I do now we wouldn't of been having this conversation. I said to Paul "We haven't spoke to each other for a few days now about anything,How we were feeling?,How do we think Mo is doing? How do we think things are going?,nothing absolutely nothing","I know its been very hard for all of us but we need to communicate. We need to tell each other about our visits,let each other know by ringing or just a simple text if its easier about any changes in our visiting times, what Mo's done, how she is etc,communication is key and Paul eventually agreed with me. If the 'lines of communication' between Paul,Ewa and myself were kept open,if we had actually SPOKEN to each other no matter how briefly,if Ewa had TOLD me she was visiting this morning,if only Paul TOLD me about Ewa feeding Mo in the evenings,EVERYTHING that happened today could so easily of been AVOIDED and thats the 'real shame'!!
