The new statistics for cancer are scary. When you look around at your family and friends, i think, who is going to be next? If i had to choose someone, it's impossible. Even though i know it does not work like that, i couldn't. But as self-preservation kicks in, and i had to choose, i could. As long as its not my 83 year old dad. But as a self confessed control freek, he has been chosen by the powers that be that its his turn.
Appologies that this post isn't all about him and his crap luck, its more about me. Yes, that is so very selfish and yes its not right. However i need to exercise a little self wellbeing for the shit storm thats coming. And i figured, i need one place to express how i fell. To me, its sitting here typing on my phone. Not really participating in the real world as these thoughts and feeling will never be spoken outloud by me. So infact its not real. Is it?
