It is a mistake. An easy mistake to make because so many people will say to you.
“You’ll fight it!”
“It will be a tough fight but you’re up to it!”
Of course it is easier to see things like that. A screaming crowd, dry ice clouds, full on laser displays while a rock anthem thumps out an uplifting beat though your skull.
“Laaaydeees and geenlemen in the red corner give it up for …..Ductal Carcinoma!”
Cut to a small pink blob in silver spandex waving at the fans.
“In the blue corner, give a big hand tooooo Your Self!”
Cut to bewildered person staring at a set of boxing gloves and wondering where to start.
The reality of battling the big C is made easier if you think that it doesn’t involve you. What the carcinoma is up against is vast battery of knowledge. Everything from ancient Greek medics, the molecular make up of D.N.A, to the bark of yew trees will be mobilised to destroy it. Sitting out the Paclitaxel infusions and having a lie down while the radiation beams through seem a very passive way to fight.
Your real fight is with yourself. To find strength to talk to your family. To ask what if the odds go against me? To deal with the fear and depression that naturally come with this event.
Fredrick The Great recommended action!
“We are made for action, and activity is the sovereign remedy for all ills”.
This was a man who knew a lot about fighting. He also knew a lot about dogs, music and potatoes.
I took action. I took my dog. I took to the hills. It was a fine morning with a clear view of greens and blues. The wind filled my lungs with clear chilled air. There really was a lark singing in the distance. I took that morning, that moment of feeling fully alive.
I felt calm enough to talk to my family. I felt I could put the anxiety and sadness in perspective. I could face my fight.
For me Big Fred had the solution. Some action how ever mundane or small will produce some benefit. Some days when the fatigue of treatment gets a hold it is a tough ask to do much. Yet even doing a small job of housework leaves you with a sense of satisfaction. You are winning! Even if it is just against a stack of washing!
