Finally realised that I had to step up pain relief to morphine last night. My account of last night is pretty graphic so skip this blog if you need to... First spoonful at 5pm made me feel a little nauseous, a bit light headed and slightly number to the pain. I soon realised that the initial dosage of one big tablespoon every 6 hours wasn't going to cut it, and at 9pm I had to take another dose. Went to bed and out like a light, felt I had about 8 hours sleep with loads of bizarre dreams, woke up it was only 10pm. Still no pain which was good, but then I wasn't swallowing. Nodded off again, must have been snoring or coughing or been restless in sleep as my wife had departed to spare room when I woke next at 1am with throat really sore when swallowing and mucus all broken at back of throat, felt as though I was drowning in it - but I wasn't, so don't worry too much. Had to take some more morphine and this time it burned my throat as it went down, pure Hell! Half hour later the pain is still there when I swallow? Hopefully it will ease and I can get some sleep. I will talk with nurses tomorrow, I hope I have the right meds - previous patients mentioned oramorph worked well, I have got morphine oral solution - they may be the same? Awake again now - its only 4am, agony each time I swallow, which I can reduce to 3-4 swallows a minute if I try. Can't face another slug of morphine (rocket fuel) mix so am going to revert back to cocodamol mix once I can summon energy up to go downstairs and make some up. Now just gone 5am, sorted all meds out (went thru the whole routine - salt water then aspirin gargles, bolted ccd painfully down neck, caphosol mouth rinse, fortisip drink through tube and flush and then cleaned up second belly button around tube, finished off with some iglu application for ulcers and some aqeaous cream applied to outside of neck. Ccd kicking in and swallowing a bit easier - need to look at pain relief through tube at hospital later today. I now have fingers crossed for at least 3 hours sleep. Yay I managed 4 hours sleep! Trouble is I woke up v.sore. Still today is another day and I hopefully will have a different attack plan for tonight once I have spoken to my consultant at the hospital.
