it has been a week since dads funeral still dont know how i feel it will be 4 weeks monday we lost him, funeral was nice we had theme tune from only fools and horses and vicar of dibley as thease were dads fav tv programs he wasnt really in to music as such and has luck would have it the boat he was captain of(oil rig stanby vessel) docked that day and was sailing that night so all dads flowers went on the boat to sea which was nice he loved he sea been out there for 52 years since he was 14.Life seems so empty now without him we were so close, weird thing happened that day though, i have dads watch and havnt taken it off since he died i looked at time day of funeral and it was 12.30,we were leaving at 1, after the funeral my friend asked me the time and the watch had jumped forward 2 hours, i checked it and dial was pushed in at side so wasnt that so i reset the time and it has been perfect since as it was before day of funeral i just cant explain why it done this????. I just dont know how to move on from this and get back to normality, cancer and my dad consumed my life for a whole year, i find it hard to sociolise and go out my partner works away so on my own most of time and my mum has my brother so often feel pushed out because of this as they are close like me and my dad was, where do i go from here???
