Struggling

1 minute read time.

Well am finding it really difficult tonight so thought i just would write some stuff down. Get it out there and then maybe I can get some sleep. 

Have my appointment with my consultant tommorrow to find out what treatment plan is. Except I already know whether it is just surgery or chemo/radiation either way my husband and I will never be able to hav the family we wanted. Im only 28. I know I should be focussing on getting better and staying alive but I am just stuck dwelling on this and cant seem to get past it so I can focus on treatment.

Honestly sometimes I just think I would give up everything just to be able to have this family even if it meant I wasnt going to be around for very long. I just dont want to go to see the consultant.

I just dont want any of this to be happening. I dont want to have to deal with it. I just am not strong enough.

Just want to either find a way to get past this issue, or find the courage to refuse treatment if I know I cant live without a family.

Its just all too hard!!!!!!!!!!!!

Anonymous
  • FormerMember
    FormerMember

    Hi Robynn, hope your visit to your consultant goes ok today. I am thinking of you and your husband.

    I hope all goes as well as it can for you both.

    love Rosie

  • FormerMember
    FormerMember

    hugs robynn.....hope everything will go as good as possible for you....

    what ido is allways look for something good , out of bad things....its not allways easy but it can be a way of bouncing back a bit...

    i am sure you will suprise yourself in the coming weeks and months and be far stronger then you think you are...right now concentrate on having your treatment and getting back on your feet...

    think of all the good things you do have....and of all the ways you are lucky in life...

    with me i think....i have cancer...but i could have been born blind what would have been even worse...

    i could have been born in a refugee camp and been starving to death...

    i know it might not help you, its just how i cope with things....allways trying to find good things in life....

    you have your hubby and he has you....

    and you have family and friends...

    people out there care about you.....

    i promise you in the end you will be ok even if that seems impossible right now.....

    you look after yourself ok.....and think about getting well.

    the most important thing is having your treatment and getting well....

    youl be suprised at how strong you can and will be...

    hugs