well im up at daft o'clock as i carnt seem to switch off, not written for a few days now as ive had my head well and truely up my back side not that i have let on...im finding all this quite difficult again i must say i thought i had overcome the worst of my fears so to speak...but there have been more of a physical effect of my treatment coming out to keep reminding me everytime i look at my hands or my arms ( after finishing my last lot of chemo i have come out in small sores on my hands and arms and head which have had to be covered up, i have them on my head too and everytime i have a itch on my head i could have a little cry) and then to top it all off this evening blooming big brother paid respect to jade goody.....well that just brought it all back home i reckon...wish i had of turned the tv over now...i know that cancer is living with me now i have no illussions on that at all and i know one day not till the very distant future hopefully, cancer will take my life i have come to terms with that in my own little way and watching that brought it all back home...the pictures ect of her children and her mum and her husband, reminded me of what i was leaving behind i.e my daughter autumn and my mummy....I think i maybe just having a little blip...we all have those, i normally shake them off with a drink or a night on the tiles but im feeling rarther ill at the momment so thats out of the window i dont think i would even have the energy to get ready for a night out.....ha Anyway i hope ur all well Lots and lots of love huggs and kiss'sEmma xxxxx
FormerMember
I have never been able to come to terms with young people in your position, for me, I have been lucky I have reached 50, my cancer will take my life at some point a I accept that, but my kids are grown, it was hard enough seeing them fall to pieces, so I can't for one moment understand what it must be like for you love. The only advice that I can give you for what it is worth is that you make the most of every day and when you feel well enough, do the things you want to do, now is the time for making those memories for your daughter and all those around you. I am a little lost on what else to say to you love. I wish you all the very best and send you loads of hugs....love Carol x
Yes life can be too short at times,but its what you can do with the time thats left. Make tapes write a
Diary,take photos. anything that will give you and your family peace of mind and some beautiful memories to be remembered by. But that could be a long way of. So when you feel up to it go out and enjoy yourself and have a good time with the Family.
You are a brave young woman. Your mom must be so proud of you. If you didn't have a 'blip' you wouldn't be normal. I watched Big Brother and I cried too.
