It's been a long time since my last blog but life has been too horrendous to write about, not just for me but for anyone reading. So for all our sakes, I'm just going to write this quickly so that I don't have to think too much
My husband got to his 3rd Cycle of chemotherapy, had an MRI, and the chemo was stopped as it just wasn't working. More fear.
Then twice, 999 in the middle of the night with blockages and renal failure in left kidney. After two weeks of suffering in hospital (and being totally mad for the first week through toxins in built up urine and too much morphine) they decide to do a CT Scan. This was on 17th Nov. At this point we hadn't even been given the result of the MRI, even though we kept asking. On 24th Nov. we received a letter saying to make arrangements to be at Clatterbridge Hospital for Oncology in Liverpool for Planning for Radiotherepy. What? Still no results of anything and no-one to talk to as the Oncologist is in L/pool and not getatable. We flew to L/pool for the day last Monday (30th Nov.) My husband's Oncologist had decided to take the day off, the Radiologist said. Well, that was the last straw. I demanded to speak with somebody from his team .......and then the bombshell........my poor husband who was all but abandoned by the medical professional from the very beginning, (see my profile).....has three to six months to live.
We are going through every emotion but anger is top of our list. How do I keep strong for him when I have to hide in the toilet crying? If I could drive to the beach to scream it may help but I wouldn't leave him. It's just not fair. I just know nothing anymore.
Love and good wishes,
Tricia. X
