a really horrible day

1 minute read time.

FormerMember

28 Sep 2010

Hi, I don't know where i am going with this but i guess i just need to 'type it out'

I have had a really tough day today.

Mum and I met with the lady from the fund-raising fund for the leukaemia ward that dad was treated on throughout his cancer journey. We raised £1095 for them from donations at dads funeral. It was a fantastic amount and the woman (pauline) was delighted, the money goes straight back into the ward not into the hospital funds.

They also have a charity shop for the ward too so mum and dad ad agreed that all of his clothes etc would go there so that the ward still benefits.

This morning mum and i put dads things into bags ready to take to them, i was instantly upset just by moving his stuff i could smell him. Mum was crying too as we were folding things and i begged her not to do it, it hasn't even been 3 months and i felt that it was too soon for her to make such a huge step. She said if she didn't do it now she never would......i had to put the bags in the car and also had to take them from the car to the shop.

Mum and i got back in the car and just cried.

I feel like i want to go and buy them all back, i know she didn't give them everything she has kept lots but it hurts so much.

I feel so sick now this hurts so so much.

FormerMember over 14 years ago

Hard day for you, but you know your dads things will be doing good , which is what he would want, you can take a little comfort in that.....even if it is only a little, he's living on through your kindness to others.....

Liz xoxoxox
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FormerMember over 14 years ago

Hi Vicki,

My heart goes out to you. My mum passed away two weeks ago and I haven't got the heart to sort through her things yet. It is such a hard thing to do.

What an achievement to raise so much money for a worthy cause at your Dad's funeral though. You've done a really wonderful thing.

Yil x
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FormerMember over 14 years ago

Good morning Vicki, just read about your horrible day - well I think what you both did was sooooo strong and powerful. You are both dealing with grief and moving on at the same time - tough call. Maybe you could have something that reminds you most of dad and keep it in a safe place in bedroom for when you want to feel him close. Your mum must be going through absolute hell clearing her pre-life from her! I am very proud of you both and believe it or not, what you both did was very important, giving to others when you have lost so much. The ward must be so thankful/grateful to you both. One day at a time Vicki and let those tears come whevever you want. Kindest regards, Ann x
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FormerMember over 14 years ago

Hay that is one of the hardest things to do, letting go of loved ones stuff. After Dad died mum and i came home from the hospital to find my sister had already bagged up everything, nothing in site and mum was gutted. We all have to take our time and do it our way. i really feel for you as having gone through this situation severl times know how hard its been for you.

You take care of yourself,

love and hugs Jan xx
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