hi i am a new member. My dad died 2 and a half years ago from colon/lung/liver and brain cancer, he had suffered for 5 years from the illness.
I was 16 when my dad died, and the 5 years that my dad was ill were extremely tough for me, I had to become very strong at a early age because i thought i was going to lose my dad as soon as I had found out that he had cancer, the nurse told my mum the maximum he would live is 5 years.
He first got it in his colon and after many sessions of chemo he was in the clear for a bit, after a while the cancer had returned and just kept spreading, he was a very strong man and never wanted to show me or my family that he was suffering even though we knew he was. It was very difficult for me to see my dad in that state especially when it came to the last year before he died because that was when he found out that it got to his brain and from then he was slowly getting weaker and i knew it was coming to the end of his life!
after 5 years o the 17/11/08 he had lost his battle against cancer, its been 2 and a half yrs since he has died and the pain just never goes away I think of him everyday and it seems to just get harder, I took care of him during the 5 years along with my mum, I know that hes rested now and he was suffering but i just cant help it lately i think of him and just cant stop crying, I feel like i missed out on my time with my dad because since being young all i could remeber is him being ill, and the fact that he suffered for so long.
How do i deal with it? its just nt getting easier for me:(
