Turns out they weren't kidding about this BEACOPP being harsh. J's just gone off for his 3rd day of chemo on the trot. It's been a bit rough so far.
Wednesday was awful. He had a full day of it. Consultant in the morning then 5 IV chemo drugs in the afternoon. His friend was bringing him home and he managed to get back in one piece but he said he was sweating and unable to talk in the car. As soon as he opened the car door he was sick everywhere - up the path, in the bushes, all over the toilet. It was pretty grim. He isn't really a sicky person and I've never ever known him not to make it to the toilet before. He looked so grey and awful. It was 5.30 when he got home, he went straight to bed, I woke him at 8pm with an anti-sickness tablet and a phone call from his mum. He cried on the phone to her unable to bear the thought of having to go back the next day for more of the same. Then he went back to sleep, wit no tea or anything in him. We both had a rough night, he was tossing and turning and i was mostly just listening to him and crying and thinking how the hell is he going to get through it?
But get through it he did. He is so bloody tough, I am amazed by him. Another friend was taking him through yesterday morning and he got himself up, forced himself to have a weetabix and went off for more of the same. I;m glad to report that it was a better day. he was armed with knowledge i'd got from his hodgkins group (thank God for them) and asked for different sickness tablets and they seem to have done the trick. It was a shorter day for him yesterday - just one, 2 hour IV. He was home for 2pm and he managed to stay up and have some tea and watch TV with us. His colour is better and he has twinkle back. Like I say he was back in today but not dreading it nearly so much. Should be another short one then he is free until next week. I'm off too. Got 2 weeks holiday, trying to keep going with the kids and not lose the plot. It was my birthday yesterday. I've never felt less celebratory in all my life. Got hundreds of messages on Facebook along the lines of Happy Birthday have a Wonderful Day! And thought what planet are you all on??!! . I was nicely spoilt too with lots of throughtful presents and cards from real life friends - I'm not having a go at anyone. On the whole i love how we're being taken care of - i just feel different to everyone else now - we're on a totally different plane and there isnt a single thing anyone could do about that..:-(
