I joined ths site in June 2007. I was caring for my terminally ill wife who died in the September of that year. I found friendship and support in this place from fellow carers, family and friends of sufferers and from patients themselves. I have stayed a member of the site since joining, though have often looked for a convenient time to slip away unnoticed. What has kept me here has been the spirit of understanding that exists and the fact that I often felt my presence was beneficial to others.(It may not have been but I allowed myself to think it was)
Yesterday I was admitted to the RPA hospital in Sydney suffering from an acute form of Vertigo, bit worse than a few too many bevvies would cause. After a 12 hour battery of tests scans ECG's blood tests etc I was given a manipulation called the Dix-Hallpike procedure that completely cured my problem.
I was celebrating at home a complete clean bill of health when the hospital's emergency team phoned asking me to return immediately. Further scans were done and so far they have discovered a abdominal mass about the size of a fist.So I have been admitted to hospital for nasty biopsies to be performed.
Am I scared? Not sure. Numb would be a good description.
The scenarios that are being discussed are:-
a. This might be benign but
b. It most probably is not.
I am learning now first hand what all patients go through on discovering they may have a life threatening condition.
So far the only benefit I can see from my examinations here in Australia as opposed to the experience of the UK is that there is no waiting for results. Within half an hour of a CT Scan I am being shown the resulting images and they are being discussed with me. I well remember the two week wait for results in the UK and the angst that built during the delay. Often we would go to find out what a CT scan had shown only to learn that the scan had been mislaid and we would have to return at a later date. Everything here is computer linked. Even my GP can log on and review my CT Scan within minutes of it being taken.
Anyway, I digress. Some of my immediate family have thought it was not healthy for me to continue to look in on the site and now they are going to feel justified. Has my mystery mass got its origins in the Cancer Site? Do I know more than I ought about the likely possibilities that I face?
As I sit and write this it is 7.15am Saturday morning and I am in the emergency department waiting for a bed on the Gastro ward. New South Wales nurses are currently taking strike action, which ironically has caused the closure of beds especially in light of their stated objectives, which to improve the ratio of nurses to patients to 1:4 and they claim their actions are in the interests of patients.
What happens next? Watch this space.
