I’m a bit late getting this update out – so sorry about that.
The final chemo treatment went without incident although several people came and went in the room and I heard many horror stories relating to veins and PICCs etc so it was a bit distressing but good encouragement for me for my dissertation work.
I was also able to pick up my first prescription for Tamoxifen that I will be starting on the 19th October. It appears to be 1 tablet per day for 5 – 10 years .... but obviously I’m starting with a 1 month supply!
The following day I collected my Mum from the airport and in search for some privacy, took her out to dinner in a lovely quiet pub with the intention of talking her through my last few months.... well.... the conversation just didn’t seem to go that way.
The next day, Emmet (my youngest son) stayed home from school – the doctor declared he may have a viral or bacterial chest infection and prescribed steroids and antibiotics, saying if it got worse we may need to take him to the hospital. The poor wee mite!
Again, in search of a quiet place and time to have ‘that chat’, I took mum out while I arranged to have a piece of carpet whipped (don’t ask!). While that was being done we popped into a local garden centre for a light lunch. Well.... I had avoided putting on any make up that morning, knowing that my lack of eyebrows would be a give-away. I was just steering the conversation towards my wig thinking it would lead talk about my general appearance when mum asked me if I had shaved my eyebrows. And that was it. I got a little tearful as I told her the whole story but she was absolutely fine with it all. She had not had any thoughts that anything was wrong until she had seen my eyebrows that morning and she became suspicious. It turns out that my Grandmother had a lumpectomy in her early 80s. She had radiotherapy (but no chemo) and was taking Tamoxifen for a few years as well. Suprise suprise, Granny also kept this to herself and mum only found out when reviewing Granny’s meds shortly before she died. This ‘not telling people so they won’t worry’ seems to run in the family!
So, this last treatment has been horrible in its impact. The painkillers are not killing all the pain, my taste buds have deteriorated further – even coffee isn’t nice now and everything I eat makes me feel sick, the numbness in my hands and feet is more severe and seems to be extending and I swear that my lips are starting to feel funny. There are days when ‘chemo brain’ plays havoc with my head and whilst I know what I want to say, finding the right words is near impossible. Having mum here has been lovely but she really has not seen me at my best! I can’t wait for this to be over... and am delighted that there is no more chemo on the horizon.
On Tuesday it was my 19th wedding anniversary and mum thought she would be babysitting while hubby and I went out for a meal. Instead, she is cooked a curry from my childhood in the hope it might tickle my taste buds. I managed a few mouthfulls before I started to feel sick which was a few more than everything else I have tried so I was a happy girl! Mum left yesterday and I was very sad to see her go but I think she will come back around Christmas which should be great.
I have my Radiotherapy simulation appointment on Friday afternoon so that I’m ready for the treatment to start 2 weeks later. Bring it on!!!!
I’m hoping that I will get my energy back next week as I’m hoping to have my first recording session of the year in October - I’ll need to start singing whilst beavering away on my dissertation !!! I'm hoping the time pressure will help me focus on my research - I have about 5 weeks to get this done now! Please keep an eye out for the surveys I'll be posting. I'm hoping the data I collect will help convince the NHS to make Portacaths more readily available to those that need and want them.
TTFN
Noj x
