My step dad has mesothelioma from asbestos. It's very aggressive. They have just said today his prognosis is not good. They gave time scale of 7-9 months. He has never been I'll before in his life but now he looks awful. My mum and us are distraught. I have two kids, 7 and 1. My 7 year old is his papas best friend. They are great together and I cannot comprehend when I have to tell him more info. I've told him he's Ill and he was upset at that. I'm also expected to get married next April. I need him at my wedding. I need to bring it forward but now due to money at short notice I don't how we can do it. I'm absolutely distraught. I cannot imagine my life without him.
My mum also has a fatal kidney disease and none of us are a match. She's ok at moment(touch wood), but stress makes we worse. I can't cope trying to make sure everyone's ok, trying to make sure my kids are happy and oblivious to what is happening. I feel sick at this news. He was diagnosed in December, chemo starts next week. I can't lose him.
FormerMember
My heart goes out to you as you find yourself in this awful situation. News like that just comes as a BANG it's so devastating. But somehow with strength and resillience you CAN and will get through this.
I have no practical advice or words of wisdom as to how you move forward from here but simply wish you the strength i mentioned. When the time is right along the way you will make decisions together as a family. Also a big hug is sent your way ((hug))
So sorry to hear of your double Wammy but judging by the response you have had already you know there are others on here who not only understand but are here to support, that is the beauty of the site, others, have been there so understand through experience.
OK know its from a guys point of view, but what;s the money problem about the wedding? Bring it forward and just share with those you love and feel close too, you can have Your Step Dad there so it will still be such a memorable day and all you want or need.
Later, if money problems are less severe, then have a blessing or a celebration of your relationship with more friends, if they are your real friends they will know and understand. Telling your son is harder I know and really all you can do is tell him as much as he can cope with at a time, not suggesting you lie to him in any way, just be honest and try to answer his question, do not overload him with facts he does not need to know unless he asks.
You can also contact the Macmillan help line for help and support any time between 9am - 8pm Monday - Friday - the Free Phone number is 0808 8808 0000
If you do go ahead with the wedding then let your son play a full part in the celebration and tell him how much you depend on him.
Good Luck With the path ahead for you and your family
