Friday September 24th - Another stressful day!

4 minute read time.

THIS IS ANOTHER OF MY RANTS SO PLEASE DON'T FEEL YOU NEED TO READ IT.

When I came away from the hospital last night I felt much happier leaving mum there but tonight I could have happily wheeled her out of there and brought her home.

This morning when I rung to see how mum was I was told that she would be having her CT scan at 11.20am and the results would be back by around 5pm.  I arrived at the hospital at 2.30pm to find that mum had been taken down for her scan but had been sent back to the ward without it being done.  There was a war going on between the ward and the scan department about a cannula the ward had put in mums hand ready for the dye.  Scan department said it wouldn't flush ward disagreed.  At around 3.30pm a Doctor came and removed the cannula from mums hand and insteadput one in mums foot.  We left at 4pm being assured that mum would go for her scan soon. 

Mum was quite confused when we arrived this afternoon and her nightie was covered in coffee and food although her face was clean.  I couldn't change her nightie because of the cannula in her foot and being afraid it may get knocked out if I attempted to stand her up.  On looking through her notes I found that she wasn't eating much, referred to as poor appetite.  Mum has been eating really well so I found this hard to believe.

When I got back at 6.30pm tonight mum was still sitting in the chair in the stained nightie.  She still had the cannula in her foot and had not been for her scan.  I spoke to the staff nurse and she rung the scan dept again.  I heard her asking when mum would get her scan and then saying the problem was that if mum didn't get it the family were going to kick off big time!!  To be honest the scan was the least of my worries except that they seem to need the results before we can move forward with mums care.  To me it is obvious what the results will say, it's back and it's aggressive, it's not rocket science! 

 I was more concerned with how confused and out of it mum was.  I expressed concern and asked for mums blood results.  Sodium up to 112 from 110 but potassium low.  I explained that mum usually ate a banana every day and that I had told the nurse in the ward and left bananas for mum to have as this is what she was told to do by the doctor and it had worked.  Yesterday mums potassium had been fine, the sodium was the only issue.  I also expressed concern that mum was not eating according to her notes.  The staff nurse said more of the food went on mum than in her!  I asked should they not, then, be assisting her when she was eating and she agreed that that was something they needed to start doing.  I got a banana and fed it to mum, she ate every bit.  I had also taken up a muller rice and she ate every bit of that too.  They were making out mum had no appetite and was struggling to eat any food when in actual fact they were just leaving the food infront of her and then taking it away when she had only eaten a little bit.  She is so confused that once she had put down the sandwich, to maybe have a drink, she would forget the sandwich was there.

Mum was the worst I've seen her tonight.  I had her admitted so that she could get proper care and they could stabilise her sodium level.  I have had to fight to get the correct doseage of her sodium meds and she is so much more confused than she was when she went in on Tuesday.  The deterioration has been rapid.  She is on a limited fluid intake and her output has also to be measured.  I had a look at the chart today and found that yesterday some intake had been recorded but no output and today there was nothing on the chart at all.

All I want to do is to get her through this weekend when I don't have Christine around, or the family support at the hospice, and then get her into the hospice as quickly as possible.  I feel like staging a sit in on the ward as I feel that's the only way I can make sure she is cared for and monitored properly.  The fact that I can't visit until 2.30pm tomorrow afternoon is driving me mad.  I even found myself thinking tonight what if........?  What if she continues to deteriorate over the next two days?  What if she doesn't make it to the hospice?  What if she is even more confused tomorrow and doesn't know who I am?  I said something to her tonight and she told me Caroline had told her the same thing!  I am scared I'm going to lose her because of negligence after she has fought so hard against this b*****d disease!  To see her like that  tonight was devastating.  The only thing I would say is that she doesn't seem distressed.  If I go in tomorrow and find her with that dirty nightie on I will let rip!

I have now emailed PALS twice to ask for a their assistance in making a formal complaint against the MAU.  I have had no response.  Tomorrow I will try to speak to someone at the hospital as I noticed a PALS desk at reception on the way in tonight.

Another stressful day - what an understatement!!

Anonymous
  • FormerMember
    FormerMember

    oh hunni huge huge hugs what a time you are having .

    Dads notes were never written in so we had no idea about the fliud intake although it was restricted down to 500mls at one stage

    I hope that you get some joy from Pals as i think they really need to get involved to ensure your mum gets the right care .

    Is there no way your mum can get in the hospice over the weekend ???

    love and hugs to you both thinking of you xxx

  • FormerMember
    FormerMember

    Caroline, I'm so, so sorry that you have to go through this totally unnecessary stress.

    I know exactly how you feel, I've been there and found that the only time that I got action was to really jump up and down - actually to the point of swearing. Not the best answer but like yourself, I was desperate. I even asked some of the nurses why they chose that particular vocation as they certainly couldn't of cared less. No, I didn't get an answer, but I'd made my point.

    Yes, let rip Caroline, it can't do any more harm.

    I don't comment much but I read every day. I keep saying to myself, I must write, I need support, but life is too horrendous that I don't know where to start....one day.

    Thinking of you and your Mum and really pray for improvement in every way.

    Love, Tricia.X

  • FormerMember
    FormerMember

    Dear Caroline,

    I am so sorry to read of your experience and that of your Mum's today! You should not have to be the one driving the medical tests and even worse, the fact that your Mum does not even seem to be receiving basic human care - it is discraceful! Also sorry that PALS are not responding to you - go straight to the Chief Executive as soon as you are able and put your complaint and feelings in writing. They have to respond and it is so important that your Mum is treated with respect, kindness and care - all of which seem sadly missing right now.

    Its no help to you Caroline, but I do know exactly how you are feeling, having gone through similar issues with my birth Mum. It is wrong that you need to be strong and fight on your Mum's behalf, but if you must, then I know you'll find the strength from somewhere. I will be praying that they will "get their act together" in the hope that you do not need to fight, but also praying that if you do, you'll be given the strength to cope.

    Love and many cyber hugs, Rose x x x x x

  • FormerMember
    FormerMember

    is your mum in a general puropses hospital caroline ..

    i refused point blank to go into the local hospital here when i was at my lowest and they found me a bed in the local hospice were care is far superior to the general purpose hospital ..

    would it be any good phoning up the hospice where your mum has been  and telling them of all your worrys...

    i think i would throw a rage in the hospital were your mum is suppose to be getting good care and treatment...but no doubt id just get thrown out which wouldnt be much help...

    all i can think of is notify the local hospice of how they are treating your mum and tell them of your worrys..

    hoping things will improve for your mum and you as soon as possible...

    xxx

  • FormerMember
    FormerMember

    Caroline look at your mother's tongue to make sure it looks moist and not dried and cracked.  If she is not getting sufficient fluids this can cause memory problems.

    I found with my late husband I had to fight for basic care - and that was despite the fact that I was in the hospital 10 hours every day for a month.  Canulas took half a day to be inserted, and X rays to see if the feeding tubes were in place didn't materialise.  There is something very wrong with the NHS system.

    Put your complaints in writing and for each item put a separate complaint and number it.  I found that all my complaints about my husbands treatment though at different times only counted as one complaint.

    xxx