December 30th 2009 - Don't stop chatting!

1 minute read time.

Before I get on to th title of this latest blog let me tell you how my mum is today.  She is having another good day although she is having a lot of lower back pain.  This is something she had before her cancer but she says it seems worse.  It may be that just because she feels better she is doing more and so the pain has reared it's ugly head.  It seems to be bending up and down that does it and, as I've explained, dragging sheets etc out of the washer is maybe not adviseable!  We know her bones are ok as she had the scan which was clear so I'm hoping it's totally unrelated.  Tomorrow she has her chest x-ray and appointment with the oncologist although won't get her chemo until next Friday because there's no chemo in new years day.

So 'Don't stop chatting!'  Why?  Well Mum and I have only been dealing with this dreaded disease for a very short time and if it hadn't been for finding chat I don't know how I would have coped.  Anyone who has got to know me knows that I am with mum 24/7 as she lives with me.  My job, when I'm with her, is to be strong and positive and since she's been ill I've rarely gone out and left her on her own, apart from to work, when there's no real chance to talk to anyone about the situation.  At the start I had loads of questions and as time goes on I know I'll have lots more.  Who did I, and will I, turn to?  The people in chat.  So to any of you who have not given chat a chance, or have been scathing of it why not just steer clear of it?  Please don't criticise it and suggest it is closed down as for me it is the best thing being able to talk to people in the same or similar situation as myself in real time and I have only ever met friendly, helpful and compassionate people on there!

Anonymous
  • FormerMember
    FormerMember

    Hi Caroline

    I've only recently been diagnosed and joined the McMillan site. I wasn't sure about participating in the chat room as it's not something I've ever done before but can honestly say that I have always been treated with the greatest respect. The people who participate there are a very caring and supportive group and I haven't been aware of any bad feeling.

    I'm not the fastest typist in the world and when it's busy I can find it quite hard to keep up. I often find in that situation that someone will notice that I've gone quiet and ask if I'm ok. I for one would not be happy if they pulled the plug.

    Good luck for tomorrow appointments at the hospital.

    Love Alison.xx

  • FormerMember
    FormerMember

    I'm right there with you, Celi. The people on this site, and the people on Chat have "virtually" saved my life... (pun intended). I felt so alone trying to deal with the repercussions of my hubby's cancer with nobody to talk to about it for the 1st three years after his diagnosis. It's only been this last year, after finding this site, that I've been able to share, rant, and yes - laugh with others going through the same thing.  

    I hope your mom's back feels better. As a fellow back pain sufferer, I can appreciate her struggle - (as if she doesn't have enough to contend with, eh?)

    Sending you & your mom love and hugs for a happy new year!

    Mo

  • FormerMember
    FormerMember

    Hi I have been on chat a few times and have found it quite good. As you say people are friendly and sometimes quite funny.

    However, a couple of times when I have been on I have felt like I was intruding as no one was really chatting to me as I think they were having private conversations. I soon left as I felt a bit uncomfortable. I think it depends who is on.

    Would just like to say please speak to me if I go on as I'm not too boring honest!!! Lol

    I appreciate that some of you "know" each other very well and why shouldn't you chat privately, but please don't forget about us relative newcomers.

    Thanks. Debbie.xx

  • FormerMember
    FormerMember

    Hi Caroline,

    First let me wish you and mum all the best for tomorrow.  Secondly we came onto chat at roughly the same time and yes it did appear as though everyone knew each other, but they made me feel welcome and tried to help me with my problems.  Without the lovely people in the chatroom I felt as though I wouldn't have survived.  so to ny newbies  don't give up it really can work

    Love and hugs stacey.

  • FormerMember
    FormerMember

    Well done on your blog, it says it all, hope your mum has many a good day Jan   JBE