Well now that I am back home from the hospital I am expecting slow but steady progress and it is not happening! I seem to be getting worse by the day. I came home feeling tired but now I would say I am lethargic, drowsy, disinterested in everything. I am taking the tablets they gave me but it is so painful to eat and drink so I hardly bother. I feel like I have jetlag, I'm not even sure what time of the day it is. I went to bed when I got back from the hospital Wed 6th March 2013. It's now the Friday evening and I am still there. My husband is getting worried. I do get up for the bathroom and for little walks to avoid blood clots but other than that I am just lying in bed dozing. I can feel I have lost quite a bit of weight.
On Saturday morning I notice a text on my phone. It is about tennis. I have forgotten that Monday is the start of the clay court season in America and Andy Murray is hopefully playing. This seems to instantly cheer me up. Then I remember that the friend who sent the text is a nurse and better still I think she has something to do with ENT. I get in touch and she is wonderful. I had been beginning to wonder if it is the tablets making me drowsy etc. She is sure it is. We agree that I will try stop taking them and see if I can get by with paracetamol. She gives me loads of helpful advice about trying to eat and says she will be in touch regularly to check on my progress. I suddenly realise we have not been in touch since the Australian Open in January so she has no idea what is going on with me, all I have said so far is I've had my tonsils out. So I explain about the lump and the scan and the biopsies and tell her I am hoping to have a diagnosis when I go back to the hospital for my post operative check in 2 weeks. I don't say anything about cancer and neither does she but I'm pretty sure she realises. She says I can always contact her if I want to talk about anything.
Within a few hours I am feeling a lot better. It was obviously the tablets. I am now up and dressed, checking my emails, getting on with some housework etc. Eating is still a problem but I manage to get some small meals down without too much problem. It is painful but bearable.
The tennis starts on Monday 11th Mar 2013. Murray doesn't do well but I am enjoying being at home and having the time to watch lots of games. I don't usually watch unless there is a British player but I watch this entire tournament right up to the final on the Sunday. It's a great distraction and I am in very good spirits. I have hardly thought about the cancer the entire week. Just one more week to go and then I will know what is going on.
