I was on my count down, to my final treatment. Id come in chat, and everyone would say.. hey emz, guess what... id go what.. and itd be 2 to go... then again two weeks later.. hey emz, guess what... id say what? One to go.And then again two weeks later... hey emz! WELL DONE!! And I think just about everyone was in chat for the day of my last treatment, 29th of april 2010, to celebrate with me. ( I was only in chat half an hour before I had to rush of to hospital because I had a temp of 38.3, and was nuetropenic, but then later discharged myself, who wants to be stuck in hospital after theyve got freedom lol.. I wanted to be with the mac chatters hehe)
I am approaching my one year in remission, and I cannot explain how that feels. I cant get my head round how fast a year goes. Just one year ago, I had my head in a bucket, was planning on how id get through my last chemo without being sick, so that I could celebrate, I remember it well... id taken two different types of anti sick meds before id gone the hospital, eaten ginger biscuits for breakfast, id even gone out and brought the sea bands that go on your wrist, to see if that would stop me.. id got to the hospital, and had more anti sick meds. The nurses were saying, no your not going to be poorly this time, this is your last one, its not allowed. Haha... none of it worked, I was sick, very sick. But the relief I felt after knowing it was my last one. Wow.. really, just a year ago... I was bald, and looking poorly. And feeling poorly.
One year on: my hair is AMAZING!! I love it... im looking well.. (put on a bit of weight, but the zumba will sort that out, incase you don’t no.. zumba is a dance/exercise class) I have a new boyfriend now, he treats me like a princess, and he is just so nice to me, makes me feel so wanted, and most importantly he accepts me for who I am today, whereas my ex boyfriend didn’t, he wanted me back to how I was before cancer... (thats not possible)...well I have to say, I am just really so happy.
Although, I am due a one year post treatment scan, and my nerves are running high for that.... because I want to hear those words, “you are still in remission” .... they are having abit of a debate on which scan I should have. A PET or a CT scan, id rather the PET because it gives a more accurate answer for Hodgkin's, it would show if I had any active areas in my body, which fingers crossed, there wont be, and because of the scares iv had in the last few months, I think they will go for the PET scan, just for reassurance, for me and I guess them. so hopefully soon, they will get there bottoms into gear and sort me out a scan.
On the 12th, im due lung function tests, I no these will be poor, as ive had a cough I cant shift for the last 3 and a half weeks. But hey, im fine.
Tomorrow, and Thursday, I have two different job interviews. Fingers crossed I get one of these, as ive now not worked for...1 year and 7 months.. a long time.. but bearing in mind, 8 months of that was being diagnosed, and treatment.. and then a good 6 months recovering.. the rest, well... ive been looking but not had no luck... so hopefully il be lucky enough to get one of these jobs..
Well, im not sure what the point in this blog is, I guess its just to let you all no how im doing, as I don’t come in chat anymore. As there came a time I felt I needed to move on, and no longer had to cling on to chat for support.I will reblog again once ive had scan and lung function test, when I no the results of both.....
This brings me to a sadder note, my heart really does go out to AnnaJohns, and charly, charly may be facing a second battle with cancer (neuroblastoma), at just 8 years of age. As recent scans for charly have shown shadows. So please if you pray, keep the Johns family in your prayers, if you don’t pray, think about them. Send positive vibes, because they sure do need them. Keep strong charly, keep fighting sweetie.. and Anna, if your reading this,im always here if you need anything.
FormerMember
Dear Emziee - you're beautiful inside as well as out. Still thinking of others when you've had more than enough to deal with over the past few months. Wishing you all the very best for the scans, Val X
Glad to hear that life is back on track for you. Good luck with the job hunt, I know it's tough but the ones you miss out on are not for you. I know you'll get a great job soon because you're trying so hard and you deserve it.
I was in Chat for the big countdown and was so glad it was all over for you. You were a huge help to me in getting through my treatment. You'd make me laugh when I wanted to cry, listen when all I was doing was moaning, you were just there for me and I'll always be grateful for that.
Sending positive thoughts to you for scan/results.
