Went to meet my team at RMH Fulham Rd last thursday and to get the lowdown. Good news is that all the results from my recent scans and tests came back clear, it hasn't spread. Phew! Bad news is that if i dont have the chemo there's a 90% it'll come back and if it does, the nasty little bugger will be incurable. It's a green light in my mind. It's all go as soon as a bed is ready, probably first week in April, which is next week.....gulp!
They've come to a conclusion now as to what drugs to use. They've upped it from two to three. They're replacing doxorubicin with vincristine and dactinomycin. funny thing is i havent bothered researching these new fellas this time round. Perhaps I'm just fed up with all the medical jargon that I've been bombarded with and need a break from reading about all the horrid side effects I may or may not get. I'll just have to cross those wobbly bridges if and when I get to them!
I told my babies this weekend about Mummy's 'Special Medicine' and for a 7 and 9 year old, they took it really well. I took the opportunity to tell them while going for a walk in the woods. I had written a little leaflet explaining it in a way for young children to understand but not get scared, and memorised what I penned down, so just told them. I used the word 'Sarcoma' instead of 'cancer' and 'special medicine' instead of 'chemotherapy' I told them that the medicine will make me feel sick sometimes, very sleepy, and will make my hair fall out but after I've finished taking my medicine, all my hair will grow back. We then went home and my little girl and I tried on some bandana's and head scarves :o)
It was such a relief to tell them. A huge weight off my mind. We talked openly about mummy going back to hospital and they have totally absorbed and understood what mummy said. It was hard, but I was strong, and the wonderful sunshine we've been blessed with recently certainly helped lift my spirits enough for me to be positive and tell them. I'll post the leaflet I wrote for my kiddies. You may find it useful. even though it took about an hour and a half and a few weepy tears to write, it worked.
