I havent been on here for some time to add a post. After our October 2011 diagnosis of my wonderful mum having 1 year to live with advanced stomach cancer, we enjoyed a really good 9 months of her health improving after a very heavy and intense chemo session from Oct-Jan 2012. We just got stronger and stronger and went on holiday, she returned on 1st October from Lanzarote looking well but her gall bladder (how they found the cancer and impossible to remove) was playing up and getting worse. She took morphine for it and continued to increase the dose through October, by November her tummy was starting to swell up and her ankles and was feeling weak and losing weight. What then followed were 3, 1 week visits to the hospital to have the fluide (acities) drained off, every time she caught a water infection and weakened. On 30th December after a Christmas of her being ill and my dad catching Shingles on his head she wasnt looking good at all so we called an ambulance for her, she was weak, in need of fluids, antibiotics to get rid of the water infections and needed the fluid draining off her tummy again. The morphine and the antibiotics caused hallucinations and they even sent her for a brain CT to see if it was anything nasty, which thankfully it wasn't. Since she has been out of hospital she has been very low and requires round the clock care. As I recently separated from my husband, my mum and dad are I are the only family. I am so incredibly proud of my mums fight, she has been brave and focused, she never let her good quality of life stop her, so seeing her in pain and poorly is heartbreaking. My dad has tried really hard but as she is ill himself its been a struggle for him, but he has taken brilliant care of her. I am also proud of myself, to have the strength to go through my mum's battle, deal with my dad, deal with a separation and house sale and stressful job. Sometimes having everything thrown at you at once is overwhelming and the stress of it all makes me feel physically sick but I feel so lucky to have had quality time with my parents over the last year. I really got to know then well, not just as parents but as friends. I got to talk to them about things I would probably never have talked about before. Mum's condition is rapidly deteriorating, she can barely eat and is weak and thin. I just wish people didnt need to suffer like this towards the end, if I left my dog to suffer like this I would be arrested. Overall when I summarise her care, so far it hasn't been inspiring,her GP surgery has been poor, made errors on her medication and showed little compassion. The hospital in general has been good, but slow to diagnose infections and Macmillan nurses have been relatively OK. What astounds me is that you are left to guess what to do, there is a general feel for a lack of support and who to turn to for quick answers to help with my mums comfort. I think there is a gap here that needs to be filled. My mum is genuinely a wonderful person, and I am incredibly honoured and proud that she is my mum and I love her with all my heart.
