good feelings

Today I woke up with a great attitude. Now that I do understand everything with my situation and my dr.'s decisions I feel so much better. Reading some blogs I see how everyone is dealing with all of this. I know I will have down time at times. I feel fortunate to have 3 little girls to keep my mind busy and going forward. This will hang over our heads for life. However, the hardest time is at night laying in bed trying to sleep. The crazy thoughts that run through my mind goes on forever. Sometimes keeping me up for hours. I take pills to help me sleep but I do not want to become dependant on them for life. On the same note, if it gives me and my family a better quality of life I will do it. Does anyone else have this problem? The weather is gorgeous here now. That alone can really lift your spirits. I also joined weight watchers. I lost about 8lbs now... My goal is 50lbs. I think about getting my body in shape for the new boobs I will be getting in a year or so. After 3 kids they were not the same. hahahahaha...... I also feel better cause of everyone on this blog site. It is amazing how support through blogs can be so very helpful and thank you all for your kind words, support and love. I hope everyone feels great and remember that each new day is a gift for everyone with or with out any kind of illness. Hug your family & friends today. Tell your kids, family and friends you love them on a daily basis. Have a great weekend. xoxo Lauren Ryan