Hi All
Sorry been so long since i updated with what was happening.
But this litle story will explain ..
After having the usual 6 rounds of R-Chop for Non Hodgkins Lymphoma part of my tumour was still there in my chest, so approx four weeks ago i was admitted to hospital to have a week long high dose chemotherapy session called R-ICE.
After having the break from all the chemo i had i was just starting to feel a bit "normal" again until i was admitted!
Something set me off and i could not stop crying for love nor money totally broke down said i didn't want any more treatment ect, to be honest the ward they put me on was really depressing aswell which didn't help, so they moved me to isolation and gave me long chats about my feelings blah blah, decided to put me on anti depressants (which i still feel haven't helped a great deal) and then the chemo began..
R-ICE
stands for
Rituximab - Ifofsfamide - Carboplatin - Etoposide
The Ifosfomide is the nasty one as it can leave you seriously confused (As if chemo doesn't do that anyway) so had this week long chemo every day, it went ok except i felt like being in prison and every opportunity i was off the drip i was outside sniffing the air!!
The weekend i got home from this treatment i was quite ill, i couldn't walk at all, it felt like my veins were being stretched as i tried to walk (Sorry if that's too graphical) my stomache felt like it had been ripped out and i basically felt like i was dying. I remained in bed for around 4-5 days then gradually started to pick up again.
Luckily my mum is staying with me to look after my daughter i couldn't of got through it without her!!
On Weds 30th i went for a blood test and was due to go back into hospital on the following Monday 5th for 2nd week of RICE chemo, but when i got home from the hospital blood test on the wednesday i got a call from the Lymphoma unit saying i was to come in immediately as i was Neutropenic :/ which basically means your blood platelets are really low and you can severly bleed and your immune is dangerously low also.
So tail between my legs off i went just knowing they were going to keep me in for rest of that week and the following week for chemo, but it didnt stop there ohhhhhhhhh noooooooo got there they restored my platelets as i had these little blood spots appearing on my legs and arms and some bruising that went ok, said farewells to my mum and daughter who came up to visit me every day (bless, dont know why though i was a right moody cow i hate being stuck in hospital!!) woke up the next morning and my face was swollen!!! I'm like oooooookkkkkkkkk what now??????? so all these people kept coming and poking me and pulling my face into all sorts of wonderful shapes lol, then they came to the conclusion it was a bloody abcess on top of the root of a side tooth !!! :(
Now i am the biggest coward when it comes to dentists but they had a guy there that was really patient with me, took me down to this "plastic surgeon type room" at 11pm !! I sat in this chair for over an hour with him pulling, me screaming and pushing him away, had to have 7 injections to numb it completely then finally it was all over......And that was all before my next chemo had even started!
The nurses were wonderful especially the one that stayed with me she was more scared than me lol, but i just requested a lot of morphine that night while the abcess made its way out my system as they didnt have time to give me a weeks antibiotics.
Anyway............. ended up having my second load of crap Rice chemo, got home last Friday night (It really did feel like i'd be freed from prison) been in bed ever since!! it has knocked the hell out of me this time. This is my 6th day out of hospital and i still feel completely out of my brain, It's the first day I've made it down the stairs, just had some soup now feel sick, and somehow i have to make it to the hospital this afternoon for a bloody blood test :( i will prob go with mum in a cab But i have to go incase I'm Neutropenic again) OMG if they call me in again they will have to pay me this time to come back in nothing will part me from my lovely bed again and my little window i can open for fresh air lol !!
So after i have had that done today i will come home probably go back to bed becausd i ache all over so much and my head is spinning, i dont know how ive managed to type all this so please forgive spelling errors x
It's just so frustrating when you have the chemo you feel ok its AFTER it hits you for 1-2 weeks!
And the next milestone i have they have made me an appointment in London UCH for November 3rd to see a consultant about having stem cell and high chemo for 2 weeks . Which i am really peed off about i dont like the thought of being THAT far away from my family for 2 weeks, feeling like hell with no fresh air!! *cries*
