I haven’t blogged for some time, although I do come onto the site and try to respond to other people where appropriate. I think there is a always a feeling in the back of my mind that other people’s cancer is more serious than mine, or I don’t want to waste people’s time. But at the moment I am not in a good place, and I really need the love and support that this site is so good in giving. To cut a long story short, i was diagnosed with ovarian cancer stage 3C in April 2008. I did the usual carboplatin/taxol chemo and was delighted to be told in December 2008 that there was no evidence of disease. I was hoping for a long period in remission, but was just negotiating my return to work when my 6 month scan showed that my cancer was back and I had to start chemo again. I’ve just finished 6 months carboplatin as a single agent – while I didn’t feel as ill as I did with the combined regime, I’ve had a lot of problems – I had to get a port-a-cath fitted, and promptly got an infection in it, so had to go into hospital for IV antibiotics; I’ve needed blood transfusions and GCSF injections – and then I developed an allergic reaction to my chemo so had to have it administered very slowly with plenty of piriton and hydrocortisone to neutralise the effects. But I thought it was all worth it. My scan halfway through my treatment showed that some of my tumours were shrinking and although others did not appear to be responding to chemo, at least they were static. I finally finished chemo in mid January and last Wednesday went for my post chemo scan. Imagine my surprise when I had a call from the hospital on Thursday morning, asking me to come in to see an oncologist as soon as possible. Apparently I have now developed clots in my right lung, so needed to start treatment as soon as possible. I have to have daily injections for the next 6 months and reluctantly have had to learn to administer these myself. I hate the idea of sticking a needle in my tummy - but it has to be better than spending the next 6 months waiting for the district nurse to come round, unable to go out and meet friends or spend a night away from home. I thought this was pretty bad, but on Friday I was shown my scan and told that my cancer has grown. The tumours which had shown improvement 3 months ago are now growing again, and cancer has now appeared in my spleen and my bowel. Apparently I have also acquired a hernia, but as that isn’t life threatening, I’m not going to bother worrying about it! As soon as I relapsed last year, my friend and I booked a very extravagant holiday to Egypt – this trip has been known as ‘my carrot’ and has really helped me get through treatment. My husband was Egyptian and I have loads of family and friends there, so I have been travelling there for many years and really love the country and people. The idea of spending 2 weeks there in March has really helped me and I am desperate to get out there. However, it’s looking highly unlikely that I will be able to travel and I am just so disappointed. I’m sorry to sound such a moaning Minnie – I usually manage to stay fairly positive and optimistic, but at the moment I feel I’m touching rock bottom. I'm sure things will look better once I've had a chance to talk to my own oncologist and know what will happen next, but I am just so disappointed.
