cist or no cist that is the question

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A big hello to all my friends on here and to anyone who has never met me before.

I have just had 3 wonderful weeks away and came back to an emergency appointment with my oncologist.

Now let me start at the beginning. When all this happened to me the surgeon told me that I had a cist on the liver and that they were sure that that was all it was. I have had 4 scans since, 2 CT and 2 MRI and up until the last one in April my oncologist too was sure that it was just a harmless cist. My last scan was just after I had finished 6 months of chemotherapy, and lo and behold the cist had shrunk in size.

This made my oncologist suspicious so he took my scan to an MDT meeting and asked 2 different radiologists to look at them. Now they say that the blot on the scan has darkened in colour and looks granulated, so now it has become suspicious. My oncologist is sending me for a PET scan, if it comes back posititve then he is referring me to a specialist in Blackburn who deals only with the liver. If it is ok then he will ask the specialist to look at it anyway to confirm it.

I feel that it is going to come back as secondary liver cancer. I can't be so lucky as to have had bowel cancer that penetrated the bowel wall and 2 lymph nodes and for it not to have gone anywhre else.

I feel so sad, that just when I thought it was all over it might start all over again.

I dealt  with it all in my stride from the start, chemotherapy wasn't too bad. Somehow I have lost my nerve.

I need some of Carol's spirit to help me through this but I know that she needs it all for herself.

As I haven't been on here for awhile and I have found alot of people that I haven't met before I trust that all my old mates are doing well.

Love to everyone Julie XXXX

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