Have been visiting grandma every day for the past two weeks, her condition is getting worse but I never quite know what I'll find when I go to see her. Last weekend and she could barely function and was calling out for her mum, I was so scared for her, but then on Monday she was up, looking bright and went out for a ride in the car with my grandad. Things have been quite changeable since then, somedays are good, others not so much.
We have a hospital bed in the living room for her now and her pain medication is going up all the time. She can't take the oramorph anymore because can't swallow it and has diamorphine in her syringe driver with the anti sickness stuff now. Her nurses are still coming out two or three times each day/night to give extra diamorphine when she has break through pain and are still adjusting doses to try and get this under control. Strangely enough she seems to be managing without her oxygen for most of the day now, often the oxygen machine is switched on but she doesn't have the nose piece in.
We had one of the better days today. She was in pain when I arrived, her back and neck ache a lot, but she told us quite quickly instead of waiting for the pain to take hold so her meds worked within half an hour. We walked up to the gate a couple of times so that she could have a look up the street and then when the sun came out for a bit we got the stools out and sat outside. We had a nice chat while I massaged her back a little and then went in when her lunch was ready. She doesn't eat much but today she managed to get her food down OK. It was nice that after dinner she was well enough to go out in the car, they took her wheelchair and went to tesco for a look around. Hope she's still doing this well when I go tomorrow ...
