Well, my Mum is just about to go for her final chemo tomorrow and I will go with her for support, she has got through the other 5 cycles really well, no sickness, no major side effect, just two blood transfusions due to white cells being a little low. Looking back to how she was back at the end of May waiting to start Chemo and the little white book she was given with all the potential side effects, I know I wondered then just how bad it was going to beand would she be strong enough to cope.
Now 5 cycles later, she says she is torn at the fact that it is her last cycle coming up. I know that deep down, each cycle she has taken as being "special medicine" that has kept her well and now she is wondering what is going to happen next. I guess she will have a CT scan and the consultant did mention radiotherapy, which he will probably give her more info about tomorrow. Her oncologists are so good, approachable and friendly, and will tell you just what you want to know, which in Mums case, originally back in May she just wanted to know if there was a treatment and if they were prepared to give it to her, not what was likely to happen in the future. Now, she is going to be worried about not having actual treatment and will the cells start to grow once the chemo stops, hopefully she will get some answers to her questions tomorrow.
From my side of things, I am pretty stable emotionally right now, I know that is because over the last few weeks, Mum has seemed more stable to me and if she has good days so do I. I think back to her diagnosis in April and did not think that she would possibly be here by this time, if the chemo wasnt suiting, or thinking something catastrophic might happen out of the blue. You just dont know, nobody does, every case is different I have come to realise and everything is best taken one day at a time. What I do know is that she has enjoyed this summer, made it count so to speak and remains symptom free at the moment, I guess the best outcome currently is that the chemo has continued to work as it was doing half way through the treatment and it would be great if no cancer cells could be seen at this stage, I know it isnt curable, she knows too but I think she copes better by not thinking about that side of it.
I will update again after tomorrow Joanie x
