I'm gonna waffle on for a bit
Am new to this, always been the tough one, after reading some of the posts I realised I should have done this sooner, I actually phoned the Samaritans during the night, I was so desperate to talk to someone and of course sob my heart out, I cant talk to friends or family, I have to be strong for them. I just feel so alone.
My Tom (69) has lung cancer, spread through chest wall, and "eaten" 3 ribs, its inoperable, the chemo was unsuccessfull, it nearly killed him, the radiotherapy helped for a while with the pain, but now its a battle to control the pain, I found out yesterday by speaking to GP myself that my Tom has been fudging the truth with him, and is not being very cooperative, so I've got the dosage increased, and I've now taken control of his meds,
I noticed before diagnosis that my Tom's memory, and his character was changing, I could not admit to anyone that he may be suffering with early stage dementia, now with the medication, the signs are so obvious, not only to me but to the family and close friends, I've tried talking to my Tom about it, without much success, he has enough to deal with, I think I will have to write to the GP to explain so he does not loose patience, skuse the pun.
I'm home now full time as his carer, I had to leave my job after 23 years, my employer would not support me b*******, even though my Tom worked at same place for 47 years untill they forced him to retire,
I dont know how much time my Tom has left, he was so positive when first diagnosed, he wanted to live, now we dont live, the intimacy has gone, we just exist day to day, the cancer is taking my man one bit of a time,
thanks for listening
